A resident of Shore Drive East called police on April 1 after finding dog feces on the front porch of her house and in the yard. She had been away for several weeks, she told an officer, and she accused a neighbor of doing it on purpose. The officer spoke to the neighbor, who claimed to know nothing about the porch poop but did admit to leaving feces in the woman's yard in the past — but only, he said, after she had first flung some into his yard. When the officer went back to the woman, she conceded that she had indeed done so. The neighbors were warned to stop entering each other's property, stop throwing excrement at each other, and avoid all contact in future.
Romulo Quezada-Santos called police on March 30 to report his Dewalt chop saw stolen. He had left it overnight in a house he is building on Jonathan Drive, he said, but it was gone in the morning. The officer spoke with several workers at the site, who said they had not seen or heard anything suspicious. Mr. Quezada-Santos was to provide police with a serial number to help in the investigation.
David Fink, driving a beige Range Rover, was angry because he was asked by a flagger directing traffic, to stop. Heather Walter, the flagger, was stationed at the intersection of Sayre's Path and Wainscott Stone Road on April 1, working for the South Fork Wind project, when she encountered Mr. Fink. He didn't want to wait in traffic, she said later, and began yelling that the flagger had no authority to stop traffic because it was "a public road." Ms. Walter was holding a stop sign in her hand, which was extended out, but Mr. Fink continued to inch forward, she told police, until he finally made contact with her hand. She called the police after another member of her crew said a similar incident had occurred with a beige Range Rover a few weeks ago. Ms. Walter was not injured, but told an officer she believed Mr. Fink intended to annoy and harass the road crew. Police contacted Mr. Fink, who was "uncooperative," the report said. They called again, and advised him to be civil and respectful in the future.
East Hampton Village
An officer noticed water coming from the driveway at 52 Toilsome Lane on the afternoon of March 31, and determined that it was being discharged from a pool. A man on the property said he was trying to drain the pool so it could undergo maintenance over the weekend, but draining a pool into the street is prohibited in by village code. Pools must be drained into dry wells, and may not overflow onto adjacent properties or streets. The man was issued a summons and will answer it in Town Justice Court on Monday.
A John Marshall Elementary School employee smelled gas on Friday and called police, who found a leaking propane tank nearby at 44 Dayton Lane. They were able to contact the homeowner and told him to notify his propane company immediately.
An employee of White's Apothecary told police Friday afternoon that a man had come in and asked to see their most expensive perfumes. He tried to buy one, the employee said, and presented multiple credit cards, all of which were declined. He left without incident, but the employee, perhaps thinking of the recent theft at Balenciaga, called police. Officers searched the area but the man was not found.
A transformer exploded near Caswell Road last Thursday evening, prompting a nearby resident to phone the police. They found some broken wires close by, but no electrical arcing. LIPA was notified. Then on Sunday, another transformer, this one close to Startop Drive, blew up. By the time police arrived, it had smoldered and gone out.
Larry Garthwaite of Osprey Road called on March 29 to report a burst pipe at his neighbor's outdoor shower. Police arrived to find a wet mess, with a pipe spraying water from the shower. Officers were able to enter the house, but neither the owner nor a caretaker was there and their identities could not be learned. Police called the Suffolk County Water Authority to shut off the water at the street, and secured the residence before leaving.
Before sunrise on Friday, Christopher Mackie called police to his West Lake Drive home to say that three men had been hanging out in his Stay Wet Pools jeep, which has no doors, all night. He asked that police not call him back before 8, because he wanted to get some sleep. The men were gone when police arrived, and Mr. Mackie, according to their report, said to them, "You finally showed up? This was at 5 a.m., they're gone now, it's 7 a.m." The officer reminded the homeowner that he had asked not to be bothered before 8.
Mark Haslinger parked his white Audi on Main Street after 10 p.m. on Friday, but when he returned the car was missing. He feared it stolen and called police, but then realized that a few spots down from where he had parked, there was a similar white Audi. He then recalled leaving his keys in his vehicle. It turned out that the owner of the second Audi, a woman from East Hampton, had got into his car thinking it was hers, and had driven it home.
The same unlikely scenario played out again on Saturday afternoon. David Barden parked his Jeep Wrangler, with the key fob inside, in front of Harbor Pets on Bay Street. When he returned just after 3, it was gone. Village police notified other local jurisdictions to be on the lookout for the Jeep, and soon after, East Hampton Town police found a Jeep with Mr. Barden's plates headed south on Route 114. Not long after, a woman called Sag police and told them she had mistaken Mr. Barden's vehicle for her own Jeep Wrangler, which was parked a few stores over at 20 Bay Street. Both parties were reunited with their cars without further ado.
A husband and wife entered the American Hotel for dinner Saturday night, but were told the barstools they were sitting on were reserved for later guests. Upon hearing that news, the wife grew irate and started yelling profanities at the barkeeper. Osman Popovic, the manager of the hotel, reported the incident to police. The husband escorted his wife to their car before re-entering the hotel to apologize for her behavior.
Mysterious McDonald's hamburgers, accompanied by greeting cards, showed up close to midnight Friday at a Bon Pinck Way property. Julianne Baier told police that one burger was found in the mailbox, one was at the beginning of the driveway, another was by her car, and yet another on the front porch. This wasn't the first time something strange had happened, she told police: Often they will hear a knock at the door, open it, and find a traffic cone on the lawn. In February, they found one atop their mailbox. This time when they heard the knock, Mr. Baier ran outside and saw a "dark-colored truck, with lights on the roof," idling down the road, but he was unable to get the license plate information. Officers advised the couple to install cameras on the property and to get in touch if more hamburgers, or traffic cones, show up.