I had what I called a “dinner for swells” the other night. “Swell” is a word I learned from Lee Bailey, the cookbook author, lifestyle and entertaining expert, bon vivant, and Bridgehampton resident, a native Louisianan. It is an old-fashioned term used to describe important people you want to impress. In other words, you gotta step up your culinary repertoire. Was I intimidated at the prospect? No, I am never intimidated when it comes to my cooking, but I did want them to have a memorable and thoroughly enjoyable evening.

Here’s where it got tricky. I had already amassed a collection of my greatest hits recipes, sure to please, with quite a few alternate menu options, all insanely delicious. Then I realized that in this day and age, you’ve got to ask: Does anyone have any food allergies/ preferences/things they just can’t or won’t eat? 

The flurry of answers threw all of my ideas out the window: no gluten, no dairy, no nuts, no cilantro, no lobster (as if, for eight people!). There goes Michael Rozzi’s (of 1770 House) flounder with green curry sauce; it’s got cilantro, and the recipe just wouldn’t be as good without it. The wild mushroom cakes with avocado pesto and red pepper coulis contained three of the banned ingredients. Turkish zucchini latkes, nope, they have feta and walnuts. Gulp. Another friend helpfully pointed out, “Nobody said ‘no meat,’ you could have an all-meat menu.” Visions of tartare sidecarred by carpaccio, charred steak, and pork tenderloins swirled in my evil imagination. But only ever so briefly, I swear.

Even though I’m a pastry chef, I had already given up on making any kind of soigné dessert. After all, flour and sugar are now considered the devil’s scouring powders, and butter and cream Beelzebub’s emollients. It would have been honey custard with sautéed apples, Calvados, and toasted almonds. . . .

Ironically, I had a friend over the night before who informed me she was on a Dean Ornish diet and could have no oil. Yikes! For that meal I made lacinato kale salad with chopped, spicy beet sauerkraut, apricots, and almonds, some lemony chicken thighs for myself and another guest, and my dieting friend brought pre-baked Japanese sweet potatoes, the most delicious, nutritious revelation ever.

As I set the kitchen table for the swells’ dinner, I noticed the chairs don’t match, the linen napkins are never ironed, and I didn’t have enough real silverware. These things don’t really bother me. I cut some early lilacs and apple blossoms from the backyard and pilfered some daffodils from a nonresident neighbor’s property. It was all quite fetching, if I do say so myself.

For dinner I made Florence Fabricant’s lentils with merguez sausage. The panko breadcrumb and harissa topping would only go on one of the casseroles. A spaghetti squash with parsley and garlic dish would not receive its usual crowning glory of goat cheese before baking. The Spanish chopped salad would have the little bits and bobs of Manchego cheese, chorizo, Marcona almonds, and garlicky croutons on the side. This salad is a party in your mouth with romaine, arugula, sweet red peppers, Vidalia onions, and green apples in a quince paste dressing. I also served the baked Japanese sweet potato that my friend Sandy had turned me on to the night before. I am so enamored of this tuber, I bought extras to give the swells as a parting party favor.

For appetizers I looked for gluten-free crackers that would hopefully taste better than their cardboard packaging. Homemade hummus, olives, and, uh, popcorn, tortilla chips, and rice crackers rounded out that beginning of the meal.

As I chopped and washed and peeled and sauted, the warning label you often see on packaging and restaurant menus kept looping through my head: “This product may have been manufactured in a facility that also processes nuts.” My kitchen is scrupulously clean, but I was uber-conscientious as I scrubbed the almond dust off the cutting board.

Two areas in which I am always completely lacking are the colors on the plate and presentation. Our meal was brown, yellow, and purple and could have passed for a Tuesday night supper at an ashram circa 1968. Sans the merguez, of course. But it was good and my guests did enjoy it, and the conversation was boisterous, stimulating, witty, and fun. For dessert, I kept it simple and healthy: cut up mango and papaya with toasted coconut. Papaya is a bit risky. It is soft and not too sweet with a bubblegum-petroleum scent, but if you can find a good one, try it.

The night after my dinner, I went to some other swell’s party. There was a private chef with a sous chef, the embroidered linens were ironed beyond crispness, the French hand-painted plates matched! There were ramps and chanterelles, white asparagus and frisée, Parmesan crisps, pea shoots, and ribbons of radish pretty enough to adorn Marie Antoinette’s powdered and pomatummed pouffle. Wowzers!

“There is a kind of appealing grace in having the end result of a project, food or otherwise, seemingly brought off without strain,” Lee Bailey once said. So what if my napkins and chairs and silverware didn’t match and my foods were odd colors, my guests had a wonderful time, a healthy meal, and it was a relaxed and comfortable evening. When Richard and Roseanne arrived with a bottle of Domaine du Cayron 2011 Gigondas and said “Jacques Franey said you would like this,” I thought “Jacques Franey knows my name? He remembers what I like?!” By golly, now I feel like a swell!

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You know it’s spring when . . . no, it’s not the flowering trees, not the yellow irises at Town Pond, nor the peepers, though those little male frogs have been singing up a storm these nights. It’s the reopening for the season of the Clam Bar on Napeague. Daily service from noon to 6 p.m. starts tomorrow, and the menu, as expected, will include seafood specialties such as clam chowder, lobster rolls, fresh grilled tuna, soft-shell crab sandwiches, and clams on the half shell.

On Navy Road

In Montauk, Navy Beach restaurant reopens tomorrow at 5 p.m., serving  dinner through Sunday night as well as lunch on Saturday. This season’s menu includes dishes highlighting ingredients from local farms and purveyors such as Dock to Dish, Balsam Farms, Bhumi Farms, and Good Water Farms. Among the items on the menu: Montauk fluke ceviche with pickled Hamptons farm vegetables, homemade hot peppers, and Meyer lemon; Provencal Fritto, and fire-roasted sea scallops with chorizo, dates, double-smoked bacon, and spiced tomato sauce. Navy Beach has also expanded its rosé wine list, which will offer more than 25 bottles this year. 

Snail Social

Slow Food East End’s next Snail Social, a potluck party with local and seasonal beverages, hors d’oeuvres, and desserts shared by participants, will be held on Shelter Island on May 15, and reservations are now being taken. The 4 to 7 p.m. event will be held at the residence of Lisa Shaw and Tom Hashagen, and feature a talk by the hosts. Mr. Hashagen is a chef, food educator, and a concert producer at Sylvester Manor farm; Ms. Shaw teaches nutrition and food science in the East Hampton schools. Both are musicians. Tickets, $20 per person or $15 for Slow Food members, may be reserved at slowfoodeastend.org.

Deals Spring Ahead

Wintertime dining deals at the 1770 House in East Hampton have been extended through May. They include Thursday night $17.70 entrees in the inn’s tiny downstairs tavern, with a choice of a burger, meatloaf, chicken parmigiana, or Berkshire pork ribs. There are specials on wine and beer as well. 

In the main dining room and in the tavern on Sundays through Thursdays, excluding holidays, the 1770 House offers a three-course prix fixe for $35, with selections from the a la carte menu. 

For Conference Early Birds

Those who buy their tickets for this year’s Food Lab conference at Stony Brook Southampton — scheduled for the weekend of June 3 — by May 10 will enjoy a discount, at $150 per ticket plus a handling fee. Tickets are regularly $200, although students and farmers who can show proof of eligibility at registration can buy $75 tickets (plus the fee). Tickets are also available for the Saturday-night dinner only, at $75, at thefoodlab.org.

The Food Lab works to spread food education among children and adults and to provide information to those interested in food businesses. The conference weekend will include an opening night cocktail party, a host of workshops on Saturday following a keynote speech by Carla Hall, a chef and co-host of ABC TV’s  program “The Chew,” and a gala dinner prepared by Colin Ambrose of Estia restaurant in Sag Harbor.

Winery Tour Weekend

Sunday is the day for the first North Fork winery tour sponsored by Wainscott Main Wine and Spirits. Participants will board a Hampton Jitney bus in Wainscott for a trip to visit Shinn Estate, Paumanok, and Palmer Vineyards for wine tastings, with a stop for a catered lunch. A $100 fee includes all. 

The wine education series at the Wainscott shop continues on Wednesday with “Shop It Like a Somm: One Master Sommelier’s Journey (to Retail),” a talk by Dustin Wilson, a partner in Vallin Wines. The session, which includes wine tasting and costs $10, begins at 5:30 p.m. 

Those interested in either event can call the shop to sign up or send an email to [email protected].

This spring I had the honor of moderating the Peconic Land Trust’s “Long Island Grown: Food and Beverage Artisans at Work” panels for the third time. Sponsored by Edible East End, they manage to get the best people from the North and South Forks who are involved in farming, fishing, winemaking, beekeeping, baking, duck wrangling, cooking, mushroom growing, candy creating, fermenting, brewing, and more.

The sessions, which are held at the Bridge Gardens in Bridgehampton, are always followed by what they simply refer to as “refreshments.” It is more like a feast, created mostly by Rick Bogusch, the magic green thumb and chef extraordinaire of Bridge Gardens. Homemade paté with pistachios and apricots, kale pesto, warm blue cheese dip with garlic and bacon, sheep’s milk cheese with cranberries, and flourless chocolate cake. Roman Roth of Wolffer Vineyards may bring a fresh and sprightly rosé, Vaughn Cutillo of Montauk Brewing presented us with a growler full of a brand new I.P.A.

Each season when I am told who the panelists will be, I feel like a pimply teenage boy who has been practicing “Stairway to Heaven” on his dinky guitar and I’ve just been asked to fill in for Jimmy Page. (That’s a little Led Zeppelin humor, folks.) I am that in awe of these local heroes; they are rock stars.

This year’s sessions included the chefs Kevin Penner, Joe Realmuto, Noah Schwartz, and yours truly. Kevin Penner was excellent because he is smart and has strong opinions, Joe Realmuto brought the gravitas of years of experience running numerous restaurants, Nick and Toni’s being the swellest. Noah Schwartz was adorable — he brought his parents and lobster-stuffed deviled eggs from his eponymous restaurant in Greenport.

Highlights of the past panels were Michael Kontokosta of Kontokosta Winery explaining why the winery frowns upon those big ol’ limousines full of bachelorettes coming to get bombed and not much else, Nadia Ernestus of Hamptons Brine explaining the probiotic benefits of raw fermented foods, and watching Mirijana and Keith Knott of Wild Feast Foods whip up the freshest ceviche with mango and microgreens.

This past Sunday’s guests were to be Alexander Damianos of Pindar and Duck Walk Vineyards, Patty DiVello of Patties Berries and Bunches, and Tom Wickham of Wickham’s Fruit Farm. I had researched the Damianos family history of grape growing and winemaking on the North Fork. Alexander’s father, Dr. Herodotus Damianos, was one of the first winemakers there, along with Alex and Louisa Hargrave. He had a conflict at the last minute and sent his tasting room manager, Michael Krummenacker, in his stead. This was most entertaining, because apparently a lot of the Real Housewives (New York, Beverly Hills) love to drink and film at Duck Walk. Along with the Kardashians and the cast of “Mob Wives.” But all I wanted to know was “What the heck is blueberry port?!” We did find out during the refreshments portion of the afternoon.

Patty was a bit shy and hard to draw out, but she came alive when describing the teenager in a stolen car who plowed through a row of raspberry bushes and the unsolved mystery of 2007, when someone burgled 11 blueberry bushes. Horrors!

Mr. Wickham warned me ahead of time that he might go on and on, and he did, but he was such an engaging speaker, professorial and kind, that it was worth every extra word. Mr. Krummenacker was a hoot, funny and full of tasting room tidbits, like trying to get one of the Mob Wives to clean up her potty mouth. I forgot to ask myself questions about being a pastry chef, but I did bring sticky toffee date cakes and ginger snaps.

We learned what a Belshaw Adamatic Donut Robot is, and that Mr. Wickham’s wife named the Empire apple. Ms. DiVello’s favorite berry is the first Early Glow strawberry of June, and the Real Housewives like rosé. A lot.

The question-and-answer portions are always informative as well. We often get the Quail Hill farm apprentices, and everyone in the room is like-minded. We all care about the future of farming and fishing, we like knowing that the wheat for Carissa Waechter’s bread comes from Amber Waves, andhat the fields that once only grew potatoes now grow hops for beer and raise bison, and cows and sheep and goats for cheese, and organic mushrooms and berries and all other forms of fruit and vegetables. We also like the refreshing adult beverages served with Mr. Bogusch’s delicious offerings at the end of each session.

Here’s to the hard-working folks of the Peconic Land Trust and Edible East End and all the women and men taking care of our seas and bees and land.

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It’s a sure sign of spring when Gosman’s restaurant, at the eponymous dock in Montauk, opens for the season. Folks can get their seafood fix at the eatery, overlooking the mouth of Montauk harbor, at lunch and dinnertime beginning on Friday, April 29. Gosman’s will serve daily except Tuesdays until Memorial Day, when hours will be expanded.

Another waterfront restaurant, the Harbor Bistro in East Hampton, reopens for the season tonight. 

Passover Specials

In observation of Passover, both Nick and Toni’s and Rowdy Hall in East Hampton will have a la carte menu specials from tomorrow through April 30.

Though subject to change, the specials are slated to be matzoh ball soup and brisket with sweet potato tzimmes and fresh horseradish. Nick and Toni’s will offer flourless chocolate cake for dessert, and Rowdy Hall will serve almond torte with strawberries and cream. 

South Fork Kitchens To-Go

At the South Fork Kitchens Cafe, a cooperative food center on the Stony Brook Southampton campus, “clean eating” is the buzzword for a new line of grab-and-go salads, soups, and sandwiches. The cafe is in the campus student center.

It’s mid-April and the weather forecast calls for temperatures in the 30s at night. Harold McMahon Plumbing sends out a form every “spring” asking clients when they’d like their outside water turned on. The form warns against turning it on before April 15. But the cheery flats of pansies are out at Wittendale’s, so spring must be drawing nigh. Right? This is zone 7a and 7b, after all.

When people complain about our late, dreary, grey, wet spring, I remind them that September is our extra summer month, and reassure them that spring will be here . . . in June. For those who garden, this is little comfort.

This past winter was peculiarly, erratically warm. El Niño tricked the Japanese apricot tree in my backyard into blooming in December, just enough so that a bunch of tiny birds ate the blossoms and buds, and now it is bare. The small weeping cherry is blooming half-heartedly, and we’ll just have to wait and see about the apple blossoms. My least favorite harbinger of spring, forsythia (or spring puke as I prefer to call it) seems to be just fine.

If you start seeds indoors and know what you’re doing, you have already begun with beets, broccoli, cabbage, carrots, kale, lettuce, onions, peas, and spinach. The peas, spinach, kale, and lettuce should be harvestable by mid to late May.

Patty Gentry, who was a chef at the Laundry restaurant in East Hampton and the Hampton Chutney Co. long ago, has a small farm in Bellport where she uses what are called hoop houses, hoop tunnels, or my favorite, “high hoops.” Using this method she can grown tender greens almost all winter. Local farms, like Quail Hill in Amagansett, have greenhouses so that members can harvest arugula, spinach, tatsoi, and many other greens throughout the winter.

I inherited a lovely backyard when I purchased my house in Sag Harbor three years ago. My first order of business was to put up deer fencing. While living in East Hampton, the hungry Bambis would decimate all of my efforts. But I had sun, and the lavender was happy. 

In Sag Harbor, I soon realized that my backyard gets very little sun. I created a little kitchen garden that yields chives, lemongrass, parsley, a variety of sages, tarragon, and some pathetic basil. I grow greens in small wooden planters and attempt a few Sweet 100 cherry tomato plants in pots. All this with only about four hours of morning sun. I get about 32 tiny tomatoes per season. Whee! 

I had some ramps and morels at a restaurant a few days ago, so it is spring somewhere. Ramps make a brief appearance in the spring and are usually only available for two to three weeks. They look like a small scallion, and the flavor is like a cross between a scallion and garlic. The earliest ones pack a wallop; they are referred to as the “king of stink.” Morels and fiddleheads will come next, and these three together make a harmonious combination in a risotto.

For those avid gardeners out here who have been frustrated by this frosty season, fret not, the birds and the longer days are telling us it’s coming. In the meantime, here are some springtime recipes to titillate your taste buds. And remember, we’ll always have September.

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Change, Change, Change

’Tis the season for make or break decisions, when restauranteurs gear up brand-new or ongoing ventures or decide not to carry on for the next summer season. 

According to the buzz, Michael Gluckman, a well-known restauranteur who was behind the Boathouse and other restaurants, is one of the partners backing a new eatery in East Hampton, opening in the space formerly occupied by Nichol’s, and most recently Winston’s. 

Fresh Hamptons, on the Bridgehampton Turnpike in Bridgehampton, is shuttered and apparently closed for good. Also currently closed, with rumors of its demise, is Doppio in Sag Harbor. 

On Sag Harbor’s Long Wharf, Ron Perelman is the reported new owner of the building that housed B. Smith’s and then Harlow East, and rumor has it that a Hamptons version of New York City’s Le Bilboquet will open there. 

Another Manhattan-moving-east-for-the-season story is reportedly taking shape at the Topping Rose House in Bridgehampton, where word is that Jean-Georges Vongerichten will be this season’s chef. 

Over in Southampton, the Southampton Publick House is set to move out of its Bowden Square digs, taking its brewery and restaurant operations to a new as-yet undisclosed location. 

Taste of Tuckahoe

The sixth annual Taste of Tuckahoe benefit will take place on Friday, April 22, at 230 Elm in Southampton. A benefit for the Tuckahoe School, the event includes menu items prepared by a lineup of East End bakeries, delis, restaurants, breweries, and wineries.

There will also be fund-raising auctions and music by D.J. Chris Cenzoprano. Tickets are $35 in advance or $40 at the door for general admission, or $60 for V.I.P. entry, which includes a 6 to 7 p.m. open bar happy hour and first access to the menu and auctions before the main event from 7 to 10 p.m. Tickets can be purchased at Southrifty Drug in Southampton or at TasteofTuckahoe.com. 

Stuart’s Seafood

Stuart’s Seafood shop in Amagansett is now open daily with regular hours from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., though those who need to pick up their fish even earlier in the day can stop in starting at 9. The shop is taking Passover orders for gefilte fish, matzo ball soup, kugel, chocolate-covered matzos, and other foods for the holiday. 

Two Montauk Spots

Duryea’s Lobster Deck and its fish market are due to reopen tomorrow after changing hands and a bit of a revamp. 

The eatery has been freshly painted and upgraded, while still maintaining its traditional casual feel. A new addition this year is a sushi bar. The fish market will be open from 8 a.m. to 7 p.m. daily, while lunch and dinner will be available at the Duryea’s deck counter service window from noon to 10:30 p.m. on Wednesdays through Sundays till mid-June, when hours will be expanded to seven days a week. 

Arbor, a new Montauk restaurant this year where Ciao by the Beach was located last year, will be opened in mid-May by the same folks who have purchased Duryea’s. A Mediteranean-style bistro, Arbor will have a wine and beer garden featuring its own Arbor beer, made locally, as well as a selection of craft beers (12 on tap), and 16 wines by the glass.

Five Courses, Seven Wines

The Long Island Merlot Alliance will release its 2013 Merliance wine at a dinner at Wolffer Kitchen in Sag Harbor on April 24. Winemakers from Wolffer Estate, Raphael, and T’Jara will present wines that will accompany five courses. The dinner, which costs $85 per person plus tax and gratuity, will include a silent auction to raise money for the alliance’s scholarship fund, which benefits Suffolk County students pursuing studies in viticulture and enology at Cornell University. Reservations are being taken.

Wednesday Wine Class

“The Wild Man of Walla Walla: Charles Smith’s Washington Wines” will be the subject of this week’s wine talk at Wainscott Main Wine and Spirits, on Wednesday at 5:30 p.m. Lisa Kaplan will be the speaker. The cost is $10, which includes wine tasting. Reservations can be made by calling the store or sending an email to [email protected]. The weekly program will be on hiatus on April 27, for spring break, but will resume on May 4.

Wainscott Main is also taking reservations for a May 1 North Fork winery tour led by Chimene Visser-Macnaughton, the shop’s owner and a sommelier. A chartered Jitney bus will depart from Wainscott and make stops at several wineries, and for a catered lunch. A $100 ticket includes all, from transportation to lunch to wine flight tastings at each stop. 

Harbor Bistro Reopens

Over on Three Mile Harbor in East Hampton, the Harbor Bistro will open its doors next Thursday for the 2016 season.

Long Island Restaurant Week

During Long Island Restaurant Week, from Sunday through April 24, participating restaurants across the island will offer a three-course prix fixe for $27.95 plus tax and gratuity, with three menu choices available for each course. Eateries offering the deal can be found at longislandrestaurantweek.com. On the South Fork, there are three: Baron’s Cove in Sag Harbor, the Living Room at c/o the Maidstone in East Hampton, and the Topping Rose House in Bridgehampton.

Bostwick’s Reopens

Tonight is the night that Bostwick’s Chowder House in East Hampton reopens for the season. The popular eatery’s seafood-centric menu includes favorites such as baked stuffed clams, seared tuna, grilled fish tacos, seafood pasta, and oyster po’boys. Bostwick’s will be serving from 11:30 a.m. through evening dinner hours from Thursdays through Sundays until the hours expand a bit later in the spring.

Superfoods on Menu

The East Hampton inn c/o the Maidstone is including dishes made with a variety of “superfood” ingredients on its menu this month. The inn has launched the first East End outpost of Lulitonix, a New York City-based juice company, and juices and other menu items include nutrient-dense foods such as cashews, chia seeds, spinach, coconut, cayenne, aloe, matcha, and activated charcoal.

The Living Room restaurant at the inn serves breakfast, high tea, lunch, and dinner, with seasonal prix fixes and vegan and gluten-free selections. 

Healthy Kids’ Cafe

At the Golden Pear Cafe, there is a new Healthy Kids breakfast and lunch menu designed to entice the younger set to eat well. The cafe has locations in Southampton, Sag Harbor, Bridgehampton, and East Hampton. 

New Chinese

Stratis Morfogen, a Manhattan restaurateur, is opening a branch of the Jue Lan Club, his Chelsea Chinese restaurant, on Elm Street in Southampton later this month. The new eatery will occupy the space that once held Savannah and that last year was the home base for the Hamptons version of Circo.

International Brunches

The Watermill Center arts foundation in Water Mill will sponsor an international brunch series this spring, beginning at noon on April 17, highlighting the cuisine of the countries from which its visiting artists hail: Chile, Cuba, Germany, Mexico, and the United States. Brunches will also be prepared by local chefs, using foods from local farm stands, on May 22 and June 12. Admission is $75. Advance registration is required; menus will be posted one week before each brunch.  

Fermentation Instruction

Nadia Ernestus of Hamptons Brine will present “Fermentation 101: What, Why, and How?” at the Hayground School at 3 p.m. on April 24. The workshop will include a discussion of fermentation’s role through history and of the health benefits of eating probiotic-rich fermented foods. Ms. Ernestus will also demonstrate foolproof methods for fermenting vegetables, and provide tastings. Admission is $25. 

Almond’s Brussels Sprouts 

Two Ways in the Style of Caesar Salad

Serves four.

For the dressing: 

1 Tbsp. anchovy paste

2 small garlic cloves

2 large egg yolks

3 Tbsp. finely grated Parmesan

2 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice

2 dashes Worcestershire sauce

1 Tbsp. rinsed capers

1 dash Tabasco

3/4 tsp. Dijon mustard

An ice cube or two

3 Tbsp. olive oil, divided

1/2 cup vegetable oil

Freshly ground black pepper and kosher salt to taste

In a blender, puree all the ingredients except for the oils, salt, and pepper. Now, with the blender running add the oils in a thin constant stream. Season with salt and pepper.

For the croutons:

1 cup diced bread

2 Tbsp. olive oil

1 sprig rosemary

2 smashed garlic cloves

In a sauté pan gently heat the olive oil with the garlic and the rosemary. Add the bread and toast until golden brown.

Salad:

1 lb. brussels sprouts (half sliced thinly with a mandoline; half quartered) 

1 lemon cut into wedges

4 white Spanish anchovies (boquerones)

1 small piece of Pecorino Toscano cheese (for shaving)

1 quart canola oil (for frying)

Salt and black pepper to taste

In a deep and wide saucepot, preheat the canola oil to 350 degrees.

In a mixing bowl toss the shaved brussels sprouts with the croutons, a desired amount of dressing (you’ll probably end up with extra), salt, and pepper.

Arrange the salad on a platter and garnish with a couple of the lemon wedges and the anchovies.

Right before you are about to serve, carefully drop the quartered sprouts into the canola oil. Fry for 30 seconds and toss with a couple squirts of lemon and a bit of salt.

Cascade the fried sprouts over the salad. 

Shave some cheese on top and serve.

The Dock in Montauk is slated to reopen for the season tomorrow, April Fool’s Day, perfect timing, it seems, for George Watson, its owner, who is known as a trickster.

Also in Montauk, 668 the Gig Shack has reopened and is serving dinner from 5:30 till 10 p.m., even later on Friday and Saturday nights. The bar is open till 2 a.m. The Main Street restaurant’s schedule will expand as the season progresses. 

Hamptons Restaurant Week

Hamptons Restaurant Week will run from Sunday through April 10. Two dozen restaurants from Wading River to East Hampton will offer three-course meals for $27.95 (with an upcharge for certain items) all night except on Saturday, when the special is only offered until 7. Here on the South Fork, Restaurant Week enthusiasts can choose from nine restaurants. In East Hampton they are Fresno, Nick and Toni’s, and the 1770 House. Baron’s Cove, the Bell and Anchor, Page at 63 Main, and Wolffer Kitchen are taking part in Sag Harbor. In Southampton Shippy’s Pumpernickels East and Red Bar Brasserie will offer the prix fixe deal.

The full list of participating eateries, including their Restaurant Week menus, can be found online at hamptonsrestaurantweek.com.

Wine, With Cheese

This week’s wine talk and tasting program at Wainscott Main Wine and Spirits will present “What Do You Mean, the New California? The Case for Santa Barbara,” by Steve Clifton, a winemaker for Palmina Wines and La Voix Winery. The class costs $10 and takes place at the wine shop from 5:30 to 7 p.m. on Wednesday. Participants have apparently expressed a desire to have a nosh with their sips of wine, so the shop will provide a sliced baguette and has suggested a B.Y.O.C. (Bring Your Own Cheese) policy. Accompaniments to the cheese would also be welcomed though the sommeliers have suggested steering away from sweets as they can detract from the wine tasting. Each session can include between 25 and 45 people; reservations can be made by calling the shop or sending an email to [email protected].

What are you supposed to do when you are trying ever so hard to stick to a nutritious diet and you travel a lot? At home, every aspect of what you eat is under your control. When traveling, almost none of it is. Interestingly, it seems like airport terminals have gotten better about offering healthful choices (hummus, sushi, fresh fruit), but the airlines have gotten worse.

When I travel, I get panicky if I don’t have a good book and some magazines. I seldom bring a computer, I don’t have a Kindle or iPad, and even if I have music loaded on my phone, I still don’t have earplugs to listen to it. I guess I’m a woefully low-tech frequent flyer. I also need some kind of food. This is true if it’s a few hours on the Jitney, flying across the country, or hours and hours of international travel. Food appeases my waiting-at-Gate-B12-for-three-hours boredom.

On one recent flight, it was announced that the airline would not be serving peanuts (which is all it had) because a passenger on the plane was severely allergic. On another flight, the attendant refused to give me some water until the service cart was wheeling through the cabin, about an hour and a half later. This is another good reason to be prepared with your own supplies.

When I see people go through security with empty bottles and then fill them from a water fountain, I think “now that’s a clever, money-saving person!” I’m  often the idiot who spends $8 on eight ounces of Fiji water on the wrong side of security, and then have to throw it away because I forgot the rules. I also have a tendency to buy those overpriced bags of dried apricots and cashews and spicy Cajun flavored peanut and sesame-stick mixes at the airport and then notice on the plane that you can’t close the bags once they’re open. That’s when I totally freak out my fellow passengers by rifling through the seat back in front of me, looking for the barf bag so I can wrap up my leftover fruit-nut-weird-flavored mixes.

On a recent trip I was determined to only eat healthy food. I packed up a darned good salad with brown rice, kale, almonds, and apricots, the kinds of ingredients that taste just as good six hours later, don’t go bad, and don’t stink up the plane. One must be considerate of the other passengers. No garlic or onions, please! 

I used some frequent flyer miles to travel first class on Delta, J.F.K. to Minneapolis, then Minneapolis to Tucson. The airplane was a brand new 319. It had pale, glowing blue lights in the cabin. I swear, it was like the sexy, under-lit lobby of a W Hotel. It had Malin and Goetz soap and hand lotion in the lavatory, and you got hot towels to clean your hands! No wonder first class is so expensive! Our meal offering at breakfast was an egg and cheese sandwich or Cheerios. Seriously?!?! They were basically offering us a “meal” that could have just as easily come from the 7-11 in Sag Harbor or a gas station on Route 27. 

When I heard a passenger mention that she had ordered the vegetarian meal, the flight attendant announced (rather triumphantly, I thought) that she was getting the Cheerios. The meal did include some nonfat yogurt, a fruit bowl containing three grapes, two slices of cantaloupe, and two slices of pineapple — kind of a mouse-sized feast.

Strolling through the Minneapolis airport to see what kinds of foodstuffs a health-conscious person might want to buy, I was appalled at the options. There were stores that sold nothing but huge chocolate and caramel covered apples, stores with nothing but big-batch candy bags, the usual Auntie Anne’s pretzels, and the gloriously naughty Cinnabon, a treat I would have availed myself of a few years ago. Even on my return flight home.

If you can find a Starbucks in an airport (yeah, that should be real hard), you can get the oatmeal. The $5-for-half-an-ounce-of-instant-oatmeal oatmeal. Financially, you’re an idiot, but at least you didn’t go for the Chipotle mega-burrito or leaden maple scone or egg McMuffin.

I have come to enjoy the challenge of finding foods that travel well or finding food at the airport that won’t destroy my ultravirtuous diet. Protein bars will do in a pinch, although I think the whole concept is pretty bogus. Read the label, they’re basically a bunch of fattening nuts and dried fruit held together with sugar and chocolate. Take a banana or apple from home. Make a filling, grain-based salad that won’t spoil, and take an empty water bottle to fill as needed. There, you just saved about $15 that can now be used to get a premium tequila margarita when you arrive for your first day of vacation. Also take Ziploc bags with pistachios or almonds, pumpkin seeds, cashews, whatever you like.

Some airports have a chain called Cibo, which offers some pretty good options: quinoa salads, hummus with vegetables, fruit, and yogurt. If you’re compelled to buy a whole meal in the airport, the Chinese restaurants usually have something called “bourbon” chicken. Yes, it is a bit oily and probably too salty, but it’s a tasty protein fix that will fill you up before your flight. Or you could get in line behind all those cement mixers and get some McDonald’s crap.

Eating right while en route can certainly be a challenge, but it’s not an excuse to blow your diet. Plan ahead and take your own foods. If you must purchase something at the airport, choose carefully, there are options out there. As for me, I have a couple of barf bags filled with healthy goodies that have already crossed the country twice. But I feel better knowing I have them at the ready, in case we get stuck on the tarmac (“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, we are, uh, number 16 for takeoff”) or stuck in the air, or stuck at the airport . . . or stuck in Minneapolis, surrounded by caramel, peanut, gummy-bear-coated candy apples and nothing else.

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