So I went to the doctor a month ago and got the bad news. All of a sudden I have high blood pressure. My entire life I have had low blood pressure. The blood pressure of a lizard sunning herself on a mesa in New Mexico — chill, baby, chill! The doctor recommended the DASH diet. DASH is a silly acronym I keep forgetting. It’s something like “diet to abolish stupid hypertension.” No, seriously, it’s “dieting approaches to stop hypertension.”