It’s that time of year. Perhaps you are sending a daughter or son off to college, or in my case, helping a son set up his first singleton apartment. Hopefully, by now, you have taught your offspring one of the most important life skills: how to cook for his or herself. If you haven’t, woe be to those children, for they will be eating Domino’s pizza and Subway sandwiches and bagels from the cafeteria.

Some colleges and universities have meal plans and some do not. Your darling may be in a dorm room where cooking is not feasible or even allowed, but she may also be moving into her own or a shared apartment and be faced with preparing her own three squares a day.

When I attended Kenyon College in Ohio, they used a food service called Saga. There were four levels of quality: A, B, C, and D. D was for prisons and mental hospitals, C was not much better, A and B were for nice hotels and clubs. Our college had C. Hence I gained 25 pounds freshman year, because I survived on a gloppy concoction of cottage cheese, peanut butter, honey, and granola. Campus housing was 90 percent dormitories with no facilities for cooking your own food.

My son attended McGill University in Montreal, which has no meal plan. His roommates freshman year were Canadian hockey players, and as far as I can tell they all subsisted on a jumbo jar of peanut butter and beer. (The drinking age is 18 in Canada.) But my intrepid gourmet found the cheap, ethnic food courts of the underground shopping malls and survived on the relatively balanced Ethiopian, Middle Eastern, and Korean foods he found there. He did not succumb to the ghastly Tim Horton’s doughnuts found on every street corner, nor poutine, the national Quebecois dish of French fries topped with cheese curds and smothered in gravy.

If your child is fortunate enough to have cooking facilities in his dorm or apartment, here is a simple primer to get him started. First, equipment. Every kitchen needs three basic knives and they must be high quality and kept sharp: a paring knife, a chef’s knife, and a bread knife. 

Teach him how to sharpen the first two. You do know how to sharpen knives, don’t you? Second, two frying pans, one cast-iron and one nonstick. Cast-iron frying pans are cheap and can be used for baking as well as searing, sauteeing, frying, etc. For both pans, you might as well have 10-to-12-inch sizes; they are more versatile than several small ones. For the nonstick pan, I’m sorry to say you’ll have to get a moderately expensive one because it will last longer and is made with safer materials than the Teflon of yore. 

Next, get a large enough pot with a steamer basket so he can make any manner of steamed vegetables and pasta, pasta, pasta. If your darling really does like to cook, treat him to a Dutch-oven casserole. This is perfect for chilies, soups, stews, anything that calls for long, slow, even cooking. And by the way, you can often find these in perfect condition at yard sales and thrift stores. They are virtually indestructible. I am still using the Dutch ovens that my grandparents and parents used. 

Now, let’s be ever so hopeful that your child will make and eat salads often, so give him a nice wooden salad bowl with serving implements. Or a set of stainless steel or glass bowls that can do double or triple duty. A few of the boring necessities are a can opener, a set of measuring cups, baking sheet, a microplane grater (for grating ginger, garlic, nutmeg, etc.), two spatulas, two big spoons, oven mitts or pot holders, and some dish towels. 

Let him pick out his own. I was very unsuccessful in trying to pawn off some old, blue-flowered dish towels on my son. For glassware you can’t go wrong with Duralex, the cheap French, almost unbreakable glasses that come in a variety of sizes. For flatware, I recommend solid pieces. Don’t be tempted by the colorful, plastic-handled sets. Someone will inevitably leave them soaking in the sink for a few days, and they will fall apart. 

Lastly, give him one or two good, basic cookbooks like “The Joy of Cooking” or Fannie Farmer’s “Boston Cooking School Cook Book.” If your son or daughter is a vegetarian, give him or her a Deborah Madison or old school Moosewood cookbook.

I say this over and over to young people and non-cooks and newlyweds: If you know how to roast a chicken and make a decent vinaigrette, you can cook for anyone, anytime. Shortcuts are okay, too. Get some already cooked brown rice from your local Chinese takeout and make fried rice with it. Take advantage of salad bars to get the ingredients you need to make a good salad at home. Buy the preshredded cabbage from the supermarket to save time on coleslaw or the recipe for okonomiyaki. 

Always have a well-stocked pantry with canned tuna, beans, pasta, and tomato sauces. If you keep eggs, onions, shallots, Parmesan, and other cheeses in your fridge, you will always have an omelette at your fingertips within five minutes. Keep a loaf of sliced, whole-grain bread in your freezer; just take out what you need when you need it. Frozen peas and chopped spinach are damned adequate staples to keep in the freezer as well.

Don’t let your soon-to-be-independent child rely on crappy cafeteria food, overseasoned, fatty takeout, or the glop I ate in college for his or her meals. Teach this most important of life skills and he or she will be healthier, more independent, and will save a lot of money to boot!

Click for recipes

At “Garden to Table: Eating for Wellness,” a program on Saturday at Bridge Gardens in Bridgehampton, Rick Bogusch, the garden manager, will lead a trip to the site’s vegetable garden to harvest fresh vegetables, and will demonstrate how to create a delicious salad from them, which will be shared. Barbara Kinnier of the Wellness Foundation of East Hampton will explain how one can get all needed nutrients and protein from a plant-based diet. Those attending have been invited to take a picnic of vegetarian foods to share. The cost is $10 per person, and reservations, with the Peconic Land Trust in Southampton, are required.

North Fork Foodie Tour

The 10th annual North Fork Foodie Tour sets sail on Sunday from the Agricultural Center in Southold. Self-guided visits to 20 different locations of interest to foodies, from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., will include a behind-the-scenes look at farms and vineyards, cooking demonstrations, talks by food producers, and tastings. Participating locations include Deep Roots Farm, Lavender by the Bay, Macari Wines, 8 Hands Farm, and the North Fork Roasting Company. Tickets are $25 per person, with no charge for children under 12. Tickets can be purchased online at northforkreformsynagogue.org, or on the day of the tour at any of the locations.

Napa Wines

Next Thursday night brings the Living Room restaurant’s wine dinner, featuring four courses made with seasonal and local ingredients, paired with wines from the Napa Valley’s Frank Family Vineyard. The East Hampton restaurant will begin serving sparkling rosé and nibbles 15 minutes before the 7 p.m. start of the dinner. The price is $135 plus tax and gratuity.

Garden Gala

And on Saturday, Estia’s Little Kitchen will host its “Gala in the Garden,” a dinner and wine tasting, with a wine auction and live music, to benefit Slow Food East End, ALS Ride for Life, and Project Mosr. Tickets are $350 in advance only and can be reserved at slowfoodeastend.org.

Zigmund’s

203 Bridgehampton-

Sag Harbor Turnpike

Bridgehampton

631-919-5340

Daily from 5 p.m. 

Sometimes reviewing restaurants is fun and swell and delicious and sometimes it is a chore and a bore and requires a good supply of Bromo-Seltzer. (That’s old-school lingo for antacids.) Reviewing restaurants when our season is in full cry requires the driving skills of Mario Andretti, the military acumen of Gen. George Patton, and the stamina of an illegally fortified Lance Armstrong.

When I attempted to review a place last weekend, I showed up super early to get a table. I’m talking Palm Beach Shores Assisted Living Facility early. No tables. “How about if we sit at the bar?” No. “How about if we come back in two or three or four hours?” No. No room for you. 

This has happened only once before in the approximately 15 years I’ve been doing this, so I was taken aback by the inflexibility of this joint. And I suspect the chef/owner may be none too pleased when he eventually hears about it. But so it goes. I scrambled to think of a suitable substitute for a column, hence the eggplant story of last week, which I had to pull out of my, um, brain.

I had hoped this week would be easier, but when I heard that Winston Irie was performing at Zigmund’s the night I was going to review it, I panicked again. “It’ll be packed!” I thought. “I won’t be able to get in! It’s August!” So I showed up even earlier than the Ladies Auxiliary of Minneapolis Macramé  Club meetings. I showed up so early I scared the bejesus out of the bartender on duty. 

Lo and behold I was the only person there. Two of my reviewing guests had already bailed on me and left town. No biggie; my friend Steven was joining me, and that would be enough to sample the food on what turned out to be more of a mezze selection than actual restaurant menu. Then I got a message from Steven saying he didn’t feel like going out. I shamed him into joining me. I was all alone, my other guests bailed, blah-blah-blah. . . . Like a true friend, he showed up, although a wee bit begrudgingly.

In the meantime, I made lemonade out of lemons. The band was starting to set up, the drinks were half price because it was happy hour, and there is a pool table. I made a new friend in Obi, the bass player, who insisted I give him a kiss in exchange for a photo. A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. Or in my case, an old bat’s gotta do what an old bat’s gotta do.

Zigmund’s is the new establishment on the Bridgehampton-Sag Harbor Turnpike where Fresh had been for the last few years. Long ago it was the Wild Rose, and for a while it was South Fork Kitchen, opened by Bruce Buschel, the writer who blogged about the trials and tribulations of opening a restaurant. It was Mr. Buschel who transformed the space into a beautiful barn-like interior, rustic and industrial at the same time. There is a full garden in front, and now there is a piano and the aforementioned pool table inside. 

Zigmund’s is brought to us by the fine fellows Eric Lemonides and Jason Weiner of Almond, and is named after Jason’s wife, Almond Zigmund. The food is somewhat Greek, perhaps in a nod to Mr. Lemonides’s heritage.

I began my early bird “meal” at the bar with a dish of spanakopita, a glass of crisp Paumanok chardonnay, and a solo game of pool. The spanakopita was most excellent. It was a creative riff on the traditional spinach-feta pie wrapped in phyllo dough. This version was fresh, creamy, garlicky spinach with a bit of cottage cheese mixed in, wrapped in just a few sheets of phyllo and topped with crumbled feta and fresh dill sprigs. It was served in its own little cast-iron ramekin, piping hot and crisp. 

When good sport Steven arrived we ordered the eggplant dip, octopus, lamb chops, deviled eggs, and lentil with garlic spread. Every single one was delicious. The eggplant dip was spread out on a plate and topped with diced, true summer tomatoes, feta, and fresh herbs. The coolness of the dip combined with the hot, grilled pita bread served alongside was a tasty contrast. The warm octopus was as tender as could be, accompanied by a few wedges of roasted potatoes, two kinds of pickled peppers, and what looked like a sprinkling of Aleppo peppers. Even the potatoes seemed to say, “I am local, I am fresh, I was dug out of the ground just yesterday.” 

The lamb chops, one per order, were good-sized, tender little rib chops, nicely seasoned and served with a chunky cucumber tzatziki salad. A small bowl of what looked like harissa was also served with the chop. It was red and oily, but upon tasting, it seemed more like a hot, smoked paprika condiment. All great flavors together. The deviled egg was very good, mild but a bit peppery at the same time. 

The lentil with garlic spread was pale, almost more like an Italian white bean spread or chick peas, but it was full of flavor and served with more great, grilled pita. It was topped with a drizzle of fruity olive oil, fresh herbs, and had a nice whisper of cumin.

By 8:15 people started coming in to hear the music, there were a few folks eating at the bar and at some tables, and my original, unnecessary fears of not being able to get in at all were allayed.

Our waitress (the bartender) Kristen was excellent. She knew where every local ingredient on the menu came from. While many restaurants out here claim to use local produce, fish, cheese, wines, etc., these guys don’t just talk the talk. You can taste the difference and the freshness in the food. Prices are reasonable: $1 to $22.

The dessert being offered on this night was a simple, also quite Greek, assemblage of a fresh peach (Halsey’s!), with Greek yogurt, drizzled with honey and topped with toasted walnuts. It was a good combination, but alas, the peach was about four days too early for ripeness. Kristen kindly took the charge off our bill.

So I accidentally reviewed a bar that serves food rather than a restaurant. And I mistakenly feared I would not be able to get in. It ended up being a pretty festive and tasty experience. The place started to fill up, the music was lively, and the food savory and absolutely delicious.

Zigmund’s will be open year round with karaoke nights, live piano evenings, bluegrass, jazz, reggae, you name it. I’ll be going back for the food.

Not much is brand-new on the restaurant scene this time of year as established businesses and new-this-summer eateries sprint toward the end of the busiest time of year. Come Labor Day, or Columbus Day, the fate of some of the start-ups will be clear, and those hunkering down for fall and winter business will begin to revamp menus and specials and such.

At the Living Room

The Living Room restaurant at c/o the Maidstone inn on East Hampton’s Main Street is taking reservations for two upcoming special dinners. On Sept. 15, wines from the Frank Family Vineyards in California will be served with dishes designed to complement the selections. Four courses will include pumpkin-cheese ravioli with wild mushrooms and sage; red wine-poached salmon; seared Long Island duck breast, and dark chocolate truffles with berries for dessert. The dinner will begin at 7 p.m., though sparkling rosé and nibbles will be served beginning at 6:45. The cost is $135 plus tax and gratuity. 

Swedish cuisine will take center stage at the Living Room on Sept. 29, with a five-course tasting menu reflecting the heritage of the inn’s proprietors to be served for $95 per person plus tax and gratuity.

The Living Room also has a three-course prix fixe offered for $35 on Sundays through Thursdays from 5:30 to 7 p.m. 

Zigmund’s Bar

Zigmund’s Bar, a new eating and drinking spot on the Bridgehampton-Sag Harbor Turnpike in Bridgehampton, is slowly getting its groove on, and with the experienced restaurateurs of Almond behind it, will certainly rev up to be an off-season regular. There are live music events and a nightly happy hour from 5:30 p.m. till sunset, featuring $5 specials of rosé, beer, and lamb chops. The kitchen is open late every night.

When eggplants were taken from India to England long ago, they were considered an ornamental plant. They are the only major vegetable of the nightshade family (tomatoes, squash, tobacco, peppers, potatoes) that came from the Old World. According to Harold McGee in his book “On Food and Cooking: The Science and Lore of the Kitchen,” “an early ancestor may have floated from Africa to India or Southeast Asia where it was domesticated.” Eggplant was being eaten in Italy by the 15th century and in France by the 18th.

If you’ve ever seen an eggplant plant, you might appreciate why it was a prized ornamental. It has furry, soft gray-green leaves with purple veins. The single flowers form deep violet stars, similar to potato flowers. But in the olden days the somewhat bitter fruit was considered poisonous and thought to cause leprosy, insanity, cancer, and a grumpy personality. I kid you not!

Eggplants can be tricky to store and prepare. Because they are a subtropical plant, they do not appreciate the super-cold temperatures of our modern refrigeration. They are best kept for no more than a day or two out on the counter (although they will lose some moisture this way), or refrigerated, wrapped well, in the least cold part of your fridge. Fifty degrees is the ideal storage temperature. The bitterness of some eggplants comes from alkaloids and becomes more pronounced with age. In other words, those big bulbous Black Beauties you buy at the supermarket are the most likely to have some bitterness. So your best bet is to grow your own, or sample some of the freshly picked eggplants at local farm stands.

When it comes to cooking, eggplants are notorious for their spongy texture and ability to soak up gobs of oil. As a matter of fact, an ancient Turkish recipe is called “imam bagildi,” or “the priest fainted,” because the priest got the vapors after he found out how much oil his wife used to make the dish.

Some people believe that salting slices of eggplant draws out the bitterness and reduces the eggplant’s ability to absorb a lot of oil when frying. Mr. McGee doesn’t go for this theory, and says the salting only reduces our perception of the alkaloids and the bulk of the cell fluids remain. Some also believe there is a difference between male and female eggplants, but it really is just age and cold storage that produce bitterness (unless it is a particular, intentionally bitter variety of eggplant, such as those favored in India and Asia).

As far as their spongy ability to absorb oil, there is a simple solution: Don’t fry them. Brush the slices with as much oil as you wish to use, season, broil or roast them, and then proceed with your recipe for eggplant Parmesan or whatever.

The bright side of this absorbent quality and the eggplant’s rather bland but meaty personality is its compatibility with so many other flavors: garlic, tomato, and cheese for Italian dishes, scallions, miso, sesame oil, and pork for Asian dishes, yogurt, pomegranate seeds, and za’atar for Middle Eastern recipes. In India, Iran, and Afghanistan they are pickled and turned into chutneys.

Eggplants are low in calories but have plenty of fiber, potassium, manganese, copper, vitamins B2 and B6, folate, magnesium, niacin, and phytonutrients.

There are so many varieties of eggplants available right now, and so many ways to cook them, you should experiment. Some types you may come across are Caspar, a white, six-inch-long fruit with delicate flavor; Listada de Gandia, a beautiful oval shape with light purple and white stripes; Thai green, a long slender 12-inch fruit with white flesh and green skin, and Rosa Bianca, a teardrop-shaped white eggplant with a mild flavor. And then, of course, there’s the Black Beauty, that humongous truncheon of the supermarket.

When choosing eggplants, make sure they are firm, not puckery, and feel heavy. Sometimes those grocery store eggplants are as light as Styrofoam.

Small, thin eggplants can be prepared by simply throwing them on the grill. The larger fruits can be roasted, steamed, grilled, cubed, mashed — the possibilities are endless. Here are some recipes to get you past “Eggplant 101.”

Click for recipes

The East End’s restaurants are in end-of-summer mode, just getting through the busy season, so breaking news on that front is slim. But there are a few upcoming events for which foodies might like to line up tickets.

Nadia Ernestus of Hamptons Brine will present “Fermentation With a Kick: Canning Spicy Kraut” on Sept. 4 from 1 to 3 p.m. at the Amagansett Farmers Market. Besides demonstrating how to make spicy sauerkraut, she will discuss the health benefits of incorporating fermented foods into one’s diet. Tickets are $45, and the price includes all materials and supplies needed to begin making sauerkraut. They may be reserved online at amagansettfoodinstitute.org. 

Eating for Wellness

“Garden to Table: Eating for Wellness,” a program at Bridge Gardens in Bridgehampton on Sept. 10, will combine a harvesting trip to the vegetable garden, salad making, and tastings, with a talk by Barbara Kinnier of the Wellness Foundation of East Hampton, about how to get all needed nutrients and protein from plant-based foods. Those who attend have been asked to take along a picnic of plant-based foods to eat and share. Admission is $10 a person. Reservations, which are required, can be made with the Peconic Land Trust in Southampton. 

Kids’ Pizza Night

Amber Waves Farm and the Children’s Museum of the East End will mark the end of summer and the start of a new school year with a pizza night on Tuesday from 5:30 to 7 at the farm, which is behind the Amagansett Farmers Market on that hamlet’s Main Street. Pizza-lovers may choose their own toppings for personal pies to be baked in a wood-fired copper oven, and there will be family-friendly activities such as a tour of the farm, crafts, games, and an opportunity to pick fresh flowers. The cost is $35 per person, or $25 for members of CMEE or the Amber Waves C.S.A. program. Space is limited, and preregistration is required with CMEE.

Preview Tonight

A five-course tasting menu to be served at the Surf Lodge in Montauk tonight will be prepared by Gabriel Hedlund, a Swedish chef taking his focus on Nordic cuisine to a new restaurant opening in Manhattan’s East Village next month, to be called n’eat. Mr. Hedlund cooked in several restaurants in Oslo before moving to Copenhagen, where he worked at Noma and Kokkeriet before coming to the U.S. 

A cocktail hour at 7:30 p.m. will be followed by dinner, with dishes centered on local produce and seafood. The cost is $100 per person, excluding tax, gratuity, and beverages. The menu will include cured duck with pine and thyme; lamb tartare with buckwheat, chive, and borage; smoked onion with local fish, house-made fresh cheese and juniper; squid with mushroom, poached egg yolk and brown butter, and short rib with pickled berries and mini-beets.

Longstand Farm Stand

Vicki’s Veggies in Amagansett is celebrating its 35th anniversary this year. The business, with three generations involved, including the stand’s namesake, Vicki Littman, who now works alongside her mother and her daughters, grows its own offerings and also works with local farmers, bakers, and food producers. It has become a go-to spot for many foodies, including a certain ex-Beatle who lives, at least part time, nearby. A celebration tomorrow from 3 to 6 p.m. will include refreshments and other activities.

Gala Benefit

Tickets are on sale for Gala in the Garden, a Sept. 10 benefit at Estia’s Little Kitchen in Sag Harbor that will be hosted by Colin Ambrose, the eatery’s owner and chef, and his wife, Jessica Ambrose. 

The evening will include music, hors d’oeuvres, and wine and beer served in Estia’s garden, and a chance to view a collection of limited edition East End wines that will be auctioned off. A sit-down dinner for 100 guests will follow, prepared by Mr. Ambrose along with Paul Del Favero, the chef and owner of Harbor Market and Kitchen. 

The event is a fund-raiser for the ALS Ride for Life, in honor of the late Gerry Hayden, a North Fork chef who died of the disease, as well as for Slow Food East End and Project MOST. The founders of the Slow Food East End chapter, Ted Conklin, Mary and Tom Morgan, and Kate Plumb, will be honored at the gala. Tickets, which are $350, can be reserved at slowfoodeastend.org.

Harvest East End

The East End’s harvest bounty and Long Island wine will be the focus on Saturday at Dan’s Harvest East End, an annual foodies’ event. It will be held at the McCall Vineyard and Ranch in Cutchogue, and feature dishes prepared by a variety of East End restaurants and chefs, and more than 30 wines selected by the Long Island Wine Council. Geoffrey Zakarian, a chef who has appeared on the Food Network’s “Chopped” and “The Kitchen,” along with his newest show, “Cooks vs. Cons,” will be the host. 

V.I.P. tickets, with access starting at 6:30 p.m., are $285; general admission, from 7:30 to 10 p.m., costs $135.

Grey Lady East

440 West Lake Drive

Montauk

631-483-5803

Dinner nightly

First of all, I have to tell you I am not a food snob. I am not even a gourmet, more like a gourmand. I enjoy a chile con queso made with Velveeta “cheese” as much as fresh sea urchin gonads. Yes, uni are gonads, not roe. That being said, we approached Grey Lady East in Montauk with open minds and hearty appetites.

Grey Lady East has taken over Harbor’s space on West Lake Drive in Montauk. There are several other Grey Lady restaurants in Nantucket, Aspen, and New York City. We were looking forward to such classic New England fare as bluefish paté, lobster rolls, and chowdah.

The restaurant is small, with about 50 seats and more on the outdoor deck overlooking the marina. The floors have tiles that resemble weathered barn wood, the ceiling is pressed tin in parts, and the walls are white. Some plastic dune grass flora decorate a few pillars, and a few black and white surfy photos are on the walls in the bar area. Let’s call it “Pier One Imports Meets Michael Dweck Lite.” The banquettes around the perimeter are punishingly uncomfortable, with no seat cushions, although there are some thin padded cushions for the back.

Once we were seated we waited about 15 minutes for someone to notice us, the only guests in the restaurant. There was a pretty girl moving about the room, but she gave us nary a glance or acknowledgment. Eventually, she took our drink order. She was our waitress, after all!

We began our meal with grilled Spanish octopus, buffalo mozzarella with arugula, and beet with endive salad. 

The grilled Spanish octopus, priced at $18, had two tentacles in a bowl of stewed tomatoes, zucchini, a wee bit of corn, and a spicy jalapeno feta sauce. The octopus had good flavor and was very tender. The buffalo mozzarella was a ball of mozzarella served on wilted arugula with four blackberries, two shards of pickled onion, and three edible orchid petals. This dish reminded me of Coco Chanel’s mantra “take one thing off before you walk out the door.” In other words, get rid of that superfluous “enhancement.” The menu said there was also vincotto (an aged, thick, syrupy balsamic vinegar) on the salad, but there was nothing. The mozzarella and arugula had definitely seen better days, more specifically perhaps, the previous Wednesday.

When the beet and endive salad was handed to me (yes, handed to me, not placed on the table), I felt some crusty gradoo on the bottom of the plate. It looked like dried mashed potatoes, but Grey Lady doesn’t serve mashed potatoes, so uh-oh. I had already valiantly removed the hair from the lemon wedges that came with my drink, but this time I had to ask for a cleaner plate. The salad was a huge mound of frisee with a few endive leaves and some sliced beets on a pool of sour cream (“take one thing off before you . . .”). There was also a sprinkling of pistachio powder. The dressing was sweet.

For entrees we ordered the lobster roll (warm with butter), a burger, and cod. The lobster roll came with excellent hand-cut French fries. The lobster was dry and tough. My guest who ordered it, let’s call her Pollyanna, said, “The roll is toasted, that’s nice.” The burger was good, cooked to order, and served with more of the excellent fries. I’m glad it was good, because it is the same price as the Topping Rose House’s burger ($21) and $4 more than the stupendous burgers at Rowdy Hall in East Hampton. 

Fortunately, the third entree, cod in a corn and lemongrass “chowder,” was absolutely delicious. It is described on the menu as being cooked in parchment (which would have steamed it), but it was definitely pan-seared because it had a crunchy exterior. Although we could not detect even a whisper of lemongrass flavor in the creamy sauce, it did have bits of melted leeks and roasted fennel. These were wonderful, flavorful accompaniments to the perfectly cooked cod. But once again, there was an odd addition: some sliced strawberries (!) on top.

The Grey Lady’s website declares “full website coming soon.” But we’re already deep into August, folks. We inquired about the more Nantuckety-style offerings we had seen, such as the aforementioned bluefish paté, but our waitress said they change the menu “almost every day.” So it was orchid petals and strawberries where they don’t belong. There are also no side dishes, and only one dessert offered.

The service on the night of our visit was not very good, as you may have gathered. Our waitress was untrained and uninterested, therefore no names here. We were the only guests indoors, and there was one other group outside. Oh, and an old guy in a fedora with a young blonde, making our Montauk summer dining experience complete!

Prices are $12 to $30 for appetizers, $21 to $36 for entrees. There was one dessert for $10. The dessert on this evening was described as a chocolate and salted almond terrine. It was three little bites of candy bar-like squares with some strawberry slices that had escaped the cod dish, and some Hershey’s syrup situations on the plates. It was pretty good, although petite, a nice fudgy chocolate ganache on top of a slightly chewy, buttery almond bottom.

My guests on this evening are positive and kind and polite people, year-round residents of Montauk. I asked at the end of our meal, “Would you come back here and would you recommend this restaurant to other friends?” The answers were “no” and “no.”

Foodies, get out your calendars. There are a number of upcoming events, and  the time is now to secure reservations or tickets.

Shuko East

Shuko, a Manhattan Japanese restaurant, will have a pop-up dinner at the Highway Restaurant and Bar in East Hampton on Saturday night. The dinner will be a multi-course tasting menu featuring Shuko favorites. The cost is $200 per person plus tax and gratuity. Reservations may be made by calling Shuko in New York City, or at resy.com. Also on Saturday, light bites will be offered a la carte at the bar along with Shuko-themed cocktails. 

Locally Grown

Lost Foods, New Foods: Artisan Cuisine and Wines on the South Fork at the Southampton Historical Museum on Aug. 25 will highlight locally grown and produced food, focusing, according to a press release, “on efforts to bring back diversity of local foods enjoyed by our ancestors.”

 The Amagansett Food Institute will select and serve local food, wine, and other beverages, including meat and eggs, heritage-variety vegetables, and wild fish and game. Tickets for the 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. event are $125 in advance and $150 at the door, and may be reserved by sending an email to Nicole Hart at [email protected].

Food Truck Derby

The Great Food Truck Derby returns to the Hayground School in Bridgehampton on Friday, Aug. 19, when more than a dozen trucks featuring a wide range of cuisine and beverage choices circle up from 4 to 7 p.m. A $65 ticket entitles one to a serving at every food truck and drinks. A limited number of V.I.P. tickets, at $100, will allow access half an hour before lines of general admission ticketholders begin to form. Food from all trucks is not guaranteed after 5:30 p.m. Tickets may be ordered at the Edible East End magazine website. 

Clambake and Potluck Supper

Al Goldberg, a leader of the Slow Food East End group and a fisherman and chef, will host his third annual clambake and “snail supper” at his East Hampton residence on Aug. 28. The event, which will feature a menu of raw oysters, fish cakes, grilled octopus bites, and braised clams prepared by Mr. Goldberg, with mini cheesecakes for dessert, usually sells out fast. Participants are asked to take an appetizer, salad, vegetable dish, or dessert to share, made with fresh, local ingredients, and their own beverages. Tickets, available at slowfoodeastend.org, are $50 each for Slow Food members and $60 for nonmembers. 

In the Fall

Dopo la Spiaggia, a Sag Harbor Italian restaurant whose name means “after the beach,” is set to open in East Hampton in October at 31 Race Lane. It will take over the space now occupied by Race Lane Restaurant, which was, for many years, home to the Laundry restaurant, now defunct. Dopo la Spiaggia is a collaboration between Maria and Larry Baum, the restaurateurs, and Maurizio Marfoglia, whose Southern Italian cooking features dishes built around local ingredients. 

Market at Duryea’s

The new owners of Duryea’s Lobster Deck and Fish Market in Montauk have added a gourmet Market at Duryea’s to the site, offering local artisanal products. The items range from cheeses, eggs, and yogurt to baked goods, granola, honey, pickles, chips, cookies, bread, produce, and beer. Also available are coffee, newspapers, and fresh flowers. The market is open daily from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.

Jue Lan Club

268 Elm Street

Southampton

631-353-3610

Wednesday through Monday, 

5 p.m.-midnight

This review is dedicated to Freddy the fly, the musca domestica, who died valiantly trying to escape from the glutinous, candied apple syrup of our “hot and numbing crispy beef.” Sorry, Freddy, there was no escape from that quicksand of a sauce.

They call it “vibe dining” and “upscale fare.” They say it “perfectly complements the East End’s residents and vacationers.” They say “our nightlife programming will fill a void in the Hamptons hospitality scene.” They had hoped to avoid being shut down in the wee hours “by landing in a more commercial location six blocks from Main Street.” “They” apparently failed to secure the proper permits for nightlife programming, because that venue was promptly shut down by the neighbors surrounding Jue Lan Club, which also has a nightclub, Elm and Main, an art space, the Barn, and a cigar bar. Cigar bars are still a thing?

Jue Lan Club is the latest restaurant to occupy the space that was Savannah’s for many years, then Delmonico’s, then Circo’s. I have a feeling of déja vu every time I have to go back and review yet another flash in the pan, pop-up restaurant in this location, across from the train station in Southampton.

There is nothing here décor-wise that would tell you this is connected to the Jue Lan Club in New York City, which occupies the former Limelight nightclub. It is still a pretty, white wainscoted space with ceiling fans and simple decoration. There are chopsticks at the place settings and a few black-and-white photographs of John Belushi, Andy Warhol, and Mick Jagger, just to remind you of their connection to the debauched nightlife of the 1970s and ’80s.

The restaurant is labeled as upscale Chinese, but the menu is more Pan-Asian with such offerings as chicken satay, Singapore rice noodles, and curries.

We began our meal with shrimp crystal dumplings, edamame dumplings, crispy rock shrimp tempura, and yellowtail in ghost pepper oil. 

The shrimp dumplings (four to an order) were pretty good, presented in the traditional bamboo steamer basket. They were dense and chewy. There were no individual serving dishes for soy sauce, so we double dipped and dripped. The edamame dumplings came on a plate with an inexplicable pool of sweet water. They were also pretty good, but the filling had a texture of avocado mixed with peanut butter, kind of stick-to-the-roof-of-your-mouth gluey. 

The crispy rock shrimp tempura was completely lacking in crispness, ergo, it had obviously been fried earlier in the day and reheated. It had a spicy mayo sauce. We ate two or three, and really wished it had been crispy. The yellowtail in ghost pepper oil was supposed to be spicy (ghost peppers can get up to 2,200,000 on the Scoville heat unit scale!), but the dish was mild enough for a toddler. The yellowtail was fresh, but it could have used some acid or salt (or ghost pepper oil) to complement its richness.

For entrees we ordered Peking chicken, hot and numbing crispy beef, salted fish and chicken fried rice, and a side order of wok-seared Brussels sprouts with Chinese bacon. I had thought Peking style chicken was a clever idea, but it was a failure. Duck has far more flavor and moisture than chicken, which is what makes Peking duck such a delight. In this case, the chicken was basically unseasoned, fried and sliced meat served with the traditional accompaniments, of hoisin sauce, julienned cucumbers and scallions, and pancakes. So you could taste the condiments, but the chicken, added nothing to the dish. The hot and numbing crispy beef was an epic fail, not to mention Freddy’s final resting place.

Hot and numbing crispy beef is a classic Sichuan dish. The heat comes from chilies, the numbing sensation from Sichuan peppercorns, and the crispiness from the final frying up of little strips of cheap meat. It should be chewy, crunchy, and very savory. This dish was an orange-red gloppy mixture with soft meat slices. Cow candy. There was absolutely no hint of heat or Sichuan peppercorns. It was pure sugary, candy apple syrup. Once the dish started to cool, the serving spoon got stuck on the plate.

The salted fish and chicken fried rice was not fried rice. It was leftover rice with scrambled egg bits, scallions, dabs of saltfish (preserved cod), and chicken. The wok-charred Brussels sprouts had a few sear marks on them, but they were completely raw, and, like the edamame dumplings, inexplicably sitting in about half an inch of sugary water. Simply dreadful.

The service on the night of our visit was very good. Our waiter, Alex, was delighted to see a couple of dames order so much food; this may have been a first for him. 

Prices are expensive. Raw items range from $4 per oyster to $95 for a seafood tower, appetizers and dim sum are $12 to $25, noodles and rice dishes are $14 to $24, mains are $25 to $70, sides are $14 and $15, and desserts are $12.

We were informed that all desserts are made in-house, but they had run out of most of them. There was cheesecake and molten chocolate cake available so we ordered both. The cheesecake order was forgotten, but who needs cheesecake on a hot and humid summer evening in a “Chinese” restaurant, anyway? Who needs molten chocolate cake, either, for that matter? It was a round cake, with no molten interior, with a blob of Reddi-Whip, and a few artful squirts of Hershey’s chocolate syrup.

There are a lot of restaurants that open for one season, make claims about their cuisine, and transform into nightclubs and discos after hours. Union Cantina, which opened nearby in Southampton, is such a place, as is Jue Lan Club. I recently ate at Union Cantina, which claims to serve “farm-to-table” Mexican fare, and it, too, was dreadful. And what, pray tell, is farm-to-table about avocados, shrimp, and pre-shredded Monterey Jack cheese? Nada. Vibe dining, my heinie.