There's a boatload of hype and misinformation floating around about my forthcoming guide, "How to Rule the Hamptons Night Life scene . . . and Not Pay $300 Bail the Next Morning."

The buzz started last month, when I first announced the news of my book's release, slated for early December, in this column. I have heard people saying that there is no need for such a book, that anyone with half a brain could find a way to worm their way into the V.I.P. room.

Some have told me that my book would be a gigantic waste of paper (it's only 544 pages long; I don't really see the problem there). Others think I don't actually have a book deal at all, that it's just a little joke on my part, that I couldn't think of anything better to write in my column, since I was short on time and simply made up the whole thing. Who, moi?

Here's A Sample

So, to quiet the naysayers, here's another little snippet from my first-ever tome. For this, and other useful nighttime tidbits, you'll have to actually buy the book (which will be available at all BookHampton, Waldenbooks, Barnes and Noble, and Kmart locations; did I forget to mention Amazon.com, too?). Here goes.

Chapter 127 - Make Her/Him Come To You

This chapter isn't so much intended for my female readers, but could prove useful nonetheless. Really, I want to get through to the men - especially the Neanderthals among you. So, listen up, Cro-Mags, and maybe you'll have better luck with the ladies.

I'll share a little secret with you: pick-up lines just don't work. Seriously, they don't. Think about it. There's really nothing more pathetic than some drunk dude marching up to a woman in a bar and muttering, "Hey, sweet stuff! I didn't know angels could fly so low," followed immediately by a burp.

The Four "C"s

So scrap everything you've learned from watching The Fonz on "Happy Days." That was a television show. Reality is often - make that always - misconstrued on TV sitcoms. What you need is to be clever, confident, comfortable, and cool. Strike up a conversation. Don't be aggressive right out of the gate. Talk to her like a normal human being. If that's not possible, try this failproof ploy.

It's simple, really. Just walk around the bar, looking down at the floor, as if you've lost something. Sure, you'll feel like an ass for the first five minutes. But eventually, a woman will approach you, and offer to help. "What are you looking for?" she'll ask.

Make something up, something real - don't fire back with, "The girl of my dreams, and I think the search is finally over." Find a bunch of friends to go in on it, and you'll actually get quicker results. Good luck to you, and godspeed.

American Hotel, Sag Harbor. Hunky Page, jazz piano, tomorrow and Saturday, 7 p.m.

Bridges, Bridgehampton. Moira Fogerty, jazz, tonight, 8. The Dennis Raffelock Trio, jazz, tomorrow, 7 p.m. DJ Karin Ward to follow. The Poor Lost Souls, rhythm and blues, Saturday, 8 p.m. Tea dance, featuring Donna D., "London's world-famous drag superstar," Sunday, 8 and 10 p.m.

The Chequit Inn, Shelter Island. Leroy Live, acoustic rock-and-roll, Saturday, 10 p.m.

Conscience Point, North Sea. Friday night dance party, DJs to be announced, tomorrow, 10 p.m. After-party for "Hamptons Hoops For Hilfiger," hosted by Tommy Hilfiger, Saturday, 7 p.m. DJs to be announced. Employees night, with DJs Tom Laroc, Tone Tigga, Theo, Junior, Dan Barnes, and Caviar, dance, techno, and trance, Wednesday, 9 p.m.

Canoe Place Inn, Hampton Bays. Dave Koz, smooth jazz, tomorrow, 10:30 p.m.

Gurney's Inn, Montauk. John Lobosco, acoustic guitar, tonight at 9. The Precisions, lounge, tomorrow and Saturday, 10 p.m. Jim Calen, lounge, Sunday, 10 p.m. John Jason, lounge, Monday, 10 p.m. Louie D, lounge, Tuesday, 10 p.m. George Nichols, piano, Wednesday, 10 p.m.

Hampton Coffee Company, Water Mill. Fred Kolo, blues guitar, Sunday, noon to 2 p.m.

Hansom House, Southampton. The Phos, rock-and-roll, tonight, 9 p.m. The Last Chance Blues Band, blues, tomorrow, 10:30 p.m. Ray Shinnery, blues, Saturday, 10:30 p.m. Shana Young, Gothic-influenced folk, Sunday, 9 p.m.

Harbor House, Sag Harbor. Todd Shea, acoustic guitar, tonight, 9:30. Rocker T, reggae, Sunday, 9:30 p.m.

Hiding Place, Noyac. The New Creatures, reggae-influenced rock-and-roll, tomorrow, 8 p.m.

Jet East, North Sea. Employees night, with DJ Eddie, hip-hop, house, and techno, tonight at 9. DJ Eddie, hip-hop, house, and techno, tomorrow, 9 p.m. Playboy.com and St. Pauli Girl party, with DJ Eric Salas, hip-hop, house, and techno, Saturday, 10 p.m. Open bar runs from 10 to 11 p.m.

Kipling's, Bridgehampton. The Kipling's Trio, jazz, tomorrow, 8 p.m.

Lakeside Inn, Montauk. DJ Vinny K, 1980s dance pop, tomorrow and Saturday, 10 p.m. DJ Ander, merengue and salsa, Sunday and Monday, 10 p.m. Boccie league, Tuesday, 9:30 p.m. Hawaiian luau, with DJ Vinny K, 1980s dance pop, Wednesday, 9 p.m.

Life's A Beach, Water Mill. Funkmaster Flex, the legendary house, rap, and hip-hop DJ, tomorrow, 9 p.m. Playboy Magazine party, with DJs Jared Scream and Ted the Dillinger, hip-hop, progressive, and techno, Saturday, 9 p.m. Teen night, Tuesday, 9 p.m. Industry night, DJ S10, hip-hop, house, and techno, Wednesday, 9 p.m.

Maidstone Arms, East Hampton. Diana Rogers, jazz piano, Sunday, 5 p.m.

Mary Jane's, East Hampton. Andy (Crazyfingers) Boracci, jazz piano, tomorrow and Saturday, 7:30 p.m.

Memory Motel, Montauk. Karaoke night, with DJ entertainment, tonight at 10. Partners in Crime, rock-and-roll, tomorrow, 10 p.m. Live music, acts to be announced, Saturday, 10 p.m. Bruce and Gabrielle, acoustic rock-and-roll, Sunday, 10 p.m. Irish night, Tuesday, 10 p.m. Irish karaoke, Wednesday, 10 p.m.

Montauk Green, Montauk. Hot Wax, contemporary dance, on the plaza, Monday, 6 p.m.

Nick's On The Beach, Montauk. Ladies night with DJ Cisco, hip-hop and dance, tonight, 11 p.m. to 1 a.m. DJ Glenn Hudson, dance pop, tomorrow, 9 p.m. Bruce and Gabrielle, acoustic rock-and-roll, Saturday, 3 p.m. The Jim Turner Band, folk-flavored rock-and-roll, Saturday, 7 p.m. DJ Cisco, hip-hop and dance, Saturday, 9 p.m. The Island Boys, reggae, Sunday, 3 p.m. Paul Collins, country-influenced rock-and-roll, Sunday, 7 p.m. DJ Cisco, Sunday, 10:30 p.m. Big Rich hosting a weekly trivia game show, Monday, 9 p.m. Karaoke contest with DJ Glenn Hudson, Tuesday, 9 p.m. DJ Bobby Bucca, dance, 9 p.m.

Nova's Ark Project, Bridgehampton. Bayou Bash 2000, with Loup Garou, zydeco, Saturday, 8 p.m. This is a benefit for the South Fork Groundwater Task Force.

N/V, East Hampton. Employees night with DJ Bretta, hip-hop, house, and techno, plus live percussionist, tonight, 10 p.m. Martini night, tomorrow, 10 p.m. DJ Reda, funky groove and house, Saturday, 10 p.m. After-party for Celebrity Hoops, a charity event for Boys Harbor and the Hillcrest Avenue Neighborhood Kids Union, featuring Sean (Puffy) Combs, Russell Simmons, Jay-Z, and various National Basketball Association players, Sunday, 10 p.m. Industry night, Tuesday, 10 p.m.

Oyster Pond, Montauk. The Stefanie Cardinali and Paul Gene Band, jazz, tomorrow and Tuesday, 8:30 p.m.

Rick's, Montauk. Claude Perritt, Jimmy Buffett covers and originals, nightly, 6 to 10 p.m.

Ruschmeyers, Montauk. Dick Solberg, "The Sun Mountain Fiddler," tomorrow and Saturday, 9 p.m.

Salty Dog, Noyac. Nancy Atlas, acoustic rock-and-roll, tonight, 10 p.m.

Shagwong, Montauk. DJ Lonestar, dance, tomorrow and Saturday, 10 p.m.

Shark Shack, Montauk. Claude Perritt, Jimmy Buffett covers and originals, tonight, 10.

Shebeen, Montauk. "Local Alternative," dance party featuring guest bartenders, tonight, 9:30. Ladies night with DJ Doreen, dance, Friday, 9:30 p.m. Latin night with DJ Juan, salsa and merengue, Saturday, 9:30 p.m. Theme night, Monday, 9:30 p.m.

Sixmilecross, Montauk. The Mercenaries, rock-and-roll, tonight, 11 p.m., followed by DJ Lonestar. The Two Ronnies, acoustic rock-and-roll, tomorrow and Tuesday, 11 p.m., followed by DJ Fitz, hip-hop, techno, and dance, tomorrow only. DJ Midge, dance music, Saturday, 11 p.m. Patrick Collins, jam rock, Monday, 11 p.m. DJ Heat, house and hip-hop, Wednesday, 11 p.m.

Publick House, Southampton. DJ Mike and DJ Paul, modern dance, tomorrow, Saturday, and Wednesday, 10 p.m.

Stephen Talkhouse, Amagansett. The Lone Sharks, eclectic rock-and-roll, tonight at 9. Richie Havens, folk, tomorrow, 8 p.m. Clarence "Gatemouth" Brown, jazz and blues guitarist, Saturday, 8 p.m. The Hackensack Men, rock-and-roll, Saturday, 10:30 p.m. Nancy Atlas, acoustic rock-and-roll, Sunday, 4:30 p.m., with The Nancy Atlas Project, rock-and-roll, to follow at 8 p.m. Europa, rock-and-roll, Sunday, 10 p.m. Acoustic night, with Gene Hamilton, funk, Monday, 9 p.m. Employees night with Halfmanwonder, Tuesday, 10 p.m. Funktion, funk, Wednesday, 10 p.m.

Sugar Reef, Sag Harbor. DJ Paulino, dance, tomorrow and Saturday, 11 p.m. Ladies night, with DJs Junior and Tone Tigga, dance, techno, and trance, Wednesday, 9:30 p.m.

Tantra, Westhampton Beach. DJ Slim Jim, modern rock and club classics, tomorrow, 11 p.m. Misery's Company, modern rock covers, Saturday, 10 p.m. and midnight, followed by DJ Slim Jim.

Tipperary Inn, Montauk. Irish night with DJ Kev, tonight, 11 p.m. Straight Wired, rock-and-roll, tomorrow and Saturday, 10:30 p.m. Amo, Celtic rock-and-roll, Tuesday, 10:30 p.m. Karaoke night, Sunday, 11 p.m. Irish night, live bands to be announced, Monday, 10:30 p.m. DJ Passion, modern dance, Wednesday, 10 p.m.

Wild Rose Cafe, Bridgehampton. Zola the Magician, tonight, 9. The Poor Lost Souls, rhythm and blues and soul, tonight, 9:30. Zombies On Broadway, blues-based rock-and-roll, tomorrow, 9:30 p.m. The Parlor Dogs, roots-rock, Saturday, 9:30 p.m. Matt Hilgenberg, jazz, Sunday, 7:45 and 10 p.m.

Unless you are in the Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney musical "Babes In Arms," where else but in East Hampton could you go to see a play in a barn and know that it might be headed for Broadway?

Where else would some of America's leading playwrights launch their plays in a field? Where would actors such as Alec Baldwin, Mercedes Ruehl, Roy Scheider, Danny Aiello, Anne Jackson, and Eli Wallach express interest in reading plays while seated on bales of hay?

A group called the Manhattan Drama Collective will put on a series of readings in East Hampton this summer at the barn on the historic Mulford Farm in the heart of the village. Plays by Jon Robin Baitz, Terrence McNally, Joe Pintauro, and Patsy Southgate, The Star's theater critic, will be read.

The Inspiration

The readings, which stem from a trial run at the barn last fall of Mr. Pintauro's "Sand Castles," will raise money for the East Hampton Historical Society, which owns the site. "Sand Castles," which was read by Ms. Jackson, Mr. Wallach, Kelly Curtis, and others, was a sellout, with eager playgoers having to be turned away.

Mr. Pintauro will have two plays in the series. The first, which will open the series on June 21 and 22 at 5 p.m., is "The Dead Boy." The series will end with his play "Faith" on Sept. 26 and 27.

Mr. McNally's play, "Andre's Mother," will be read on July 6 and 7, followed by Ms. Southgate's "Solo," on Aug. 9 and 10, and "A Fair Country" by Mr. Baitz will be on the boards on Sept. 6 and 7.

Helpful Trial

The Manhattan Drama Collective was founded by Mr. Pintauro and Patricia Watt, who is producing the readings, to celebrate contemporary American playwriting. Ms. Watt said Edward Albee and Wendy Wasserstein may participate in next summer's series.

"I normally don't care for play readings," said Mr. Pintauro, "but last year, working with really good actors, like Eli and Anne, was enormously helpful to me."

This series, he said, was not just to scout out good material but also to give playwrights a chance to work on their plays with some of the many experienced actors that spend time on the South Fork. All of those mentioned above do. He added that the series would lean toward a "post-Ibsen style."

"I feel we've rather dropped the ball on the great tradition of American playwriting - Inge, Williams, Miller - and maybe it is time to get back to that."

"To return," he continued, "to the language/story/classical realistic ap proach with a little lyricism - not too much - thrown in."

The group also would like to pick one play a season from a writer who is not as well known - new plays by new writers.

"I've been coming to the East End since I was a child," said Ms. Watt, who for some years owned and ran Havana 1919 in Amagansett. Five or six years ago she returned to her "family business" - the theater.

Ms. Watt's father, Douglas Watt, was the drama critic of The New Yorker for many years. Her mother is a producer and actress who, as Ethel Madson, starred in 14 Broadway shows.

Promising Possibilities

"I've had the idea of a series of play readings out here for a long time," she said. This year Ms. Watt also is producing an Off-Broadway vehicle, "Stones in My Pathway," about the great blues singer Robert Johnson, as well as a musical based on her father's columns called "Tables for Two," which uses his music and lyrics.

Mr. Watt explained that after the success of "Sand Castles" a number of playwrights, actors, and directors expressed interest in participating in the series. While none of the actors mentioned actually have been cast, all have local residences and all have expressed interest in being included in one or more of the plays. In addition, Mr. Baitz, like Mr. Pintauro, lives in Sag Harbor, Mr. McNally in Bridgehampton, and Ms. Southgate in Springs.

The playwrights will choose their directors, and Mr. Pintauro is hoping that Mr. Baldwin or Mr. Scheider will direct "The Dead Boy," for instance.

Priesthood

"The Dead Boy" is about what is happening to priests in the Catholic church in light of recent scandals, and how the church, from cardinals to lay members, is affected by challenges to the faith. Mr. Pintauro knows the priesthood at first hand, having joined it as a young man.

"Faith," Mr. Pintauro's second play, takes place on the East End and could, he said, be a play that follows "Men's Lives," which was adapted from Peter Matthiessen's book of that title about local fishermen, and "Heaven and Earth," a play about North Fork farmers which opens at Bay Street this summer.

It is set in the present day and is about people who have moved here from afar and people whose families have been here for generations. Specifically, it is the story of a Jesuit, whose sister is married to a Bonacker and lobster fisherman turned carpenter, who tries to make a new life here. It is also about how theological politics and differences are still so strong that they can separate families.

AIDS Drama

"Andre's Mother" by Mr. McNally is a stage adaptation of his Emmy Award-winning television film about a mother and her son, who has AIDS.

Ms. Southgate's "Solo" is a work-in-progress about a woman alone on New Year's Eve in New York City.

"Gaby Rodgers - who flogged me into it - will direct," said Ms. Southgate. Ms. Southgate, who does frequent profiles for The Star, has written several short plays, including "Freddy," which was published in the Evergreen Review and produced by Ms. Rodgers at Guild Hall. It starred Clarice Rivers and the artist Jim Dine astride a wooden horse, played by the sculptor William King. Ms. Rodgers, who also has a Springs house, has directed numerous works here over the years.

Mr. Baitz's play, "A Fair Country," was seen at Lincoln Center. This is a new version, however, in preparation for a production by Steppenwolf in Chicago in the fall. It focuses on a family of Americans in South Africa and how politics and responsibility affected a marriage and the children of that marriage.

"Jon makes politics extraordinarily intimate. I think this is one of the most stunning plays he has written - I was enraptured by it."

Not one of the 16 defendants arrested in last November's well-publicized police raid in East Hampton and Montauk had his or her case heard in the special drug court that metes out punishment in the form of supervised treatment instead of jail time. Each stood accused of selling drugs, which, as far as the County District Attorney goes, made them ineligible. That is an odd policy, given that the five drug courts now operating around the state were created to provide treatment, testing, and support services for all but violent offenders.

Knowing that addiction is the impetus for most crime, leading jurists promoted the concept of a court program designed to break the link between addiction and criminal acts. And, because the percentage of female drug defendants was growing, they created a program that addresses the special problems of these offenders. Five of the 16 arrested in the East Hampton Town raid were women.

Of the 16, 15 have pleaded guilty and six have received sentences ranging from four months in county jail to three to nine years in prison. One case is pending and the rest await sentencing.

Town police and Federal Drug Enforcement Agency officers said they had videotapes of each defendant selling cocaine, which seems to have sealed their fates. Police said each was offered a reduced sentence for becoming an informant. Defense lawyers said no one was recommended for a treatment program, though most were small-time dealers with big-time habits who had never been arrested before. Only one had been convicted previously of a felony.

The Rand Drug Policy Research Center, a nonpartisan think tank in California, released a study last week that found treatment is far more effective, socially and economically, in reducing drug-related crime than tough jail sentences. The study said "longer sentences for typical drug dealers appear cost-effective only to the highly myopic." It also is the case that only the highly myopic see prison as an answer to addiction.

Something is amiss when the District Attorney, whose recommendation can send a defendant to drug court or criminal court, in other words into treatment or to jail, makes the same determination for a teenaged addict as for a hard-core dealer.

Something also is amiss when East Hampton Town helps to subsidize an inpatient drug treatment facility with a good track record in its own backyard, while law enforcement officials ignore the possibility of treatment for those who might benefit most from it and instead pursue the harshest, and least effective, punishment.

Like every other small town in America, East Hampton loves a parade, and never more so than on Memorial Day. Montauk has its St. Patrick's Day celebration, Amagansett ragamuffins step out on Halloween, and Southampton puts its best feet forward for July Fourth, but Main Street would not be Main Street in East Hampton on Monday without its marching contingents of flag-bearing veterans, cute Girl and Boy Scouts, proud firefighters, and shiny antique cars.

Village Mayor Paul F. Rickenbach Jr. had it exactly right at Friday's Village Board meeting. "Let's show visitors what a first-class American village is all about," he said with pardonable pride.

In this place and especially on this day, there is plenty to be proud of, to think about, and to remember. First, of course, are those for whom Memorial Day was created, the men and women who lost their lives in the service of their country. It is for them that the flags will wave on Monday and the drums and trumpets sound.

Many of the shops on Main Street and Newtown Lane that will display the flag were not there as recently as 10 years ago. The surrounding countryside has changed, too, in some places almost beyond recognition. But the Woods Lane canopy of trees at the entrance to the village remains - a living memorial - and the broad street, still wide enough to drive a herd of cattle on, with Town Pond at one end and Hook Mill at the other.

Natives or newcomers, year-round residents or weekenders, mom-and-pop shops or snazzy boutiques, there are memories enough here for all of us.

Ray Parker, who lived and worked in East Hampton, and died in 1990, painted a group of oils in the years 1958 to 1965 which he called his "simple" paintings, to differentiate them from earlier work. He had received recognition as early as 1950, when he was included in the "New Talent" exhibit at the Museum of Modern Art.

In '58, he attempted to let color define the impact of his compositions. The resulting works depend upon subtleties of color variations too fine to be caught in the snares of language.

If, in another life, one had unlimited time, it would be pleasurable to devise names for all his earth-to-pastel tones - shade-on-the-back-of-a-red-house-at-4:30-p.m.-in-August, light-bursting-through-an-orange-leaf, etc.

It would be pleasurable, but pointless, because the naked eye instantly responds to Parker's vocabulary.

Washburn Gallery

I strongly recommend visiting the show of his paintings now on view at the Washburn Gallery, 20 West 57th Street in Manhattan.

Entering the skylit space, one is suddenly at ease. The paintings - although created in the era of Clement Greenberg's hegemony and adhering to formal principles of which he would have approved - are possessed of an unerring lightness, a sensibility which invites the viewer to contemplate their resonant stillness.

Most of the 20 works exhibited, which were recently discovered by the artist's two daughters and are on view for the first time, are small, but they have an impressively large scale.

The artist's deceptively simple strategy of laying down contiguous, non-overlapping areas of pure color never, surprisingly, degenerates into sameness. A mental vitality keeps every shape alive. One can tell these paintings were never rote for Parker, never dry intellectual exercises.

The care with which he defines the exact dimensions and contours of his forms is balanced by a captivating liberty with the paint. The edges of his shapes are always in motion and so are the interiors, where one can make out marks in the thickly applied medium, which looks as though it was spread on with a knife rather than by brush.

No form ever touches the edge of the frame, so that every shape appears to hover, or flutter, in space.

Varied Combinations

Often he paints lozenge-like forms, free-floating torsos of color that are sometimes combined with circular shapes, or squares with the edges rounded off.

He relentlessly varies the combinations. In one painting, four horizontals lie on top of one another. In another, five verticals of different colors include a bright yellow and green side by side, one of the more shocking tonal juxtapositions.

The most stimulating works are those in which the artist pushes the limits of the formal strictures he has set up, combining horizontals and verticals, oblong and squat figures in the same painting. In these pieces, one has a vivid impression of seeing something.

Forceful Shapes

The easiest transposition, as in Rothko's paintings, is as landscape, but it is not necessary. In one work, two horizontals of different blues could be sky and sea, below which two greens and a black could be part of a shoreline.

This interpretation, though, is only a possibility. Parker makes sure to steer clear of literal readings, partially by the reminder of raw canvas surrounding the painted areas and partly by the forceful identities of his shapes, which assert themselves as that one undefinable thing they are.

Even where he relies on simpler combinations - three horizontal oblongs, for instance - a sensual, non-diagrammatic vibrancy presides.

Precise Framing

One small painting is composed of four rounded squares pushed up against each other, swelling dangerously close to the edges. The colors are dark purple, orange, and two varieties of olive-drab. The image pulsates like a flower in bloom or a building in late-afternoon sun and shadow.

In all the small paintings, the painted canvas has been cut into a rectangle and attached to a stretched canvas, implying that the artist painted these subjects on greater expanses of canvas and afterward decided where the borders should be.

This unusual approach to framing underlines the precision of proportions in these works.

Quiet Passion

The centerpiece of the show is a large 1958 painting in which two oblong verticals - one orange, the other olive-green - flank a lavender ovoid. The orange form is somewhat larger than the green one and points a little to the left.

Marks of charcoal can be seen near the forms, indicating Parker sketched the shapes in charcoal but pinned them down in paint, not necessarily following his loosely defined drawings.

The impression is one of calm, not improvisation, as though someone wandering in the woods had come to a fork and after pondering had decided on a direction. After having made the decision, he had no second thoughts.

This painting holds its own and continues to grow in interest over time.

These are quiet paintings. They are also passionate paintings, whose colors, sometimes somber, sometimes gaudy, provoke sensations of nature and emotions at once turbulent and refined.

Trevor Kelsall, the East Hampton Village historian, has refused to wrestle a pig on the village green when East Hampton Town celebrates its 350th anniversary next year, although he did so as a teenager during the grand pageant that commemorated the 300th. The committee created to plan the 1998 program has pretty much decided it will not put on another such spectacle anyway, assembling a cast of costumed hundreds being a bit trickier in this age of new arrivals and traffic jams.

The absence of the pageant should be no great loss to the celebration, nor, certainly, to Mr. Kelsall and the pig. The ideas the committee is considering sound as if they will provide plenty of excitement and, at the same time, give all who participate a chance to bone up on East Hampton and its history. As Bruce Collins, who heads the anniversary committee, remarked recently, there are a lot of us here who "know they're in a nice place, but may not know why it's a nice place."

Teaching the history of the town is an awfully good reason to commemorate an anniversary, as Mr. Collins told representatives of about 85 community groups. And the more residents know about our heritage, the more apt they are to honor it.

In a bid to drum up help and enthusiasm for the yearlong celebration, Mr. Collins and Town Supervisor Cathy Lester have urged every group in town to find a way to participate.

The committee is planning to strike a commemorative coin and publish a book of stories and photographs, which could raise money for the cause, to fit Hook Mill out with sails and set it to grinding corn, to put on an exhibit of historical documents, and to stage a parade which, by all expectations, will surpass in length and joviality any other seen in these parts.

And, provided a copy can be located, there are plans to show the film that was made of the 1948 pageant. We'd bet a few residents would pay a dollar to watch a younger Mr. Kelsall wrestle that pig.

Guild Hall's "Women and Abstract Expressionism: Painting and Sculpture 1945-1959" is more than just a beautiful show of painting of the '50s; it is a breathtakingly beautiful show that demonstrates the final independence of the consummate art object from its maker.

What makes it a transforming event of high irony is to see how its righteous moral feminist demand for equal recognition of presence and energy during the male-dominated period of the Abstract Expressionist '50s becomes its own opposite - a declaration of independence from gender.

The work of art takes on its own life. In the end, simply looking at the paintings in this thoroughly enjoyable show will tell you nothing about whether they were made by a man or a woman. It will tell you only that they were made by authentic artists.

Seven Women

Curated by Dr. Joan Marter, professor of art history at Rutgers University, this exhibit originally opened at the Mishkin Gallery of Baruch College in New York City. At Guild Hall, it has been enlarged and amplified by the interim curator, Donna Stein.

Dr. Marter has chosen seven women painters (five of whom lived and worked on the East End) to answer the questions she asks in the catalogue: "What are the reasons, socially and culturally, for marginalizing women who were active as Abstract Expressionists? Why has the roll call of the movement included only white, urban males?"

One cannot avoid wondering how Dr. Marter arrived at her choices. Of the seven - Joan Mitchell, Elaine de Kooning, Lee Krasner, Betty Parsons, Perle Fine, Dorothy Dehner, Ethel Schwabacher - the first three are biggies who have received recognition that many a male of that era or, for that matter, any other, might well envy.

The Mysterious '50s

In the light of their increasing fame, they cannot be considered neglected. On the other hand, bringing the others out of the muddle of recent history is exciting, especially so since the '50s were a time when to be a painter was considered a mysterious calling for both men and women, and not a career, as it is today.

It was a time when everyone was in the same boat, both men and women struggling for survival, when all artists needed each other and clung to one another for warmth against the winds of cold neglect equally directed against both sexes.

Recognition, such as that accorded Jackson Pollock and Willem de Kooning, Franz Kline and Mark Rothko, was accorded only a very small group. The distinctions of gender were introduced, once the marketplace was in place, by the galleries and the museums.

Hans Hoffman, in the legendary workshops that he gave in New York and Provincetown, talked frequently about the gifts and the seriousness of his female students.

He complained, however, that once his women students met the man of their dreams, he never heard from them again. They married, had their children, and supported their men as artists.

Being an "artist's wife" was, in those days, a noble profession and it has been frequently acknowledged that the success of the male artists was in no small measure due to the brilliant diplomatic and Machiavellian power-directed activities of the artist's wife.

Krasner's Closet

Lee Krasner, wife of Jackson Pollock and painter in her own right, is the perfect example on every level of the women's dilemma of the time.

She was not only an artist's wife but a great artist's wife, using every means at her command to promote Jackson. She did so knowingly, and it was not until he was dead that she decided to come out of the marriage closet and demand recognition for her own gifts - and they truly were her own.

It is difficult, however, to separate Lee Krasner the painter from her role as the wife of Jackson Pollock, so crucial was the experience of having been married to him as part of her development as an artist.

And the same may well be said of him in his relationship to her.

A Powerful Widow

How was the artist's wife, performing in the role of cook, manager, promoter, and pusher in charge of her husband's career, able to become an independent artist?

Jackson began his career surrounded by Lee's wifehood. Lee began her career as one of the most powerful widows in the history of modern American art, surrounded by Jackson's fame and legend, protected by the estate of money and art, with connections to collectors and institutions worldwide.

To imply, as some historians and the media have done, that poor Lee was victimized by a sexist society that required her to sacrifice and subordinate her own talents to those of her husband is to ignore the fact that Lee Krasner used herself as well in her most favorite role, that of kingmaker, maneuvering power so that it would ultimately serve her own purposes.

Kingmaker With A King

By the time she joined Jackson in 1942 and moved to Springs in 1945, she was not simply a shy artist in retreat before her husband's major talent. Although she worked in the mornings in the upper bedroom of the house, she sprang into her other role as artist's wife when her husband arose.

She cooked his breakfast, encouraged him to go to work, planned the next dinner party of guests who would be useful to Jackson's career, arranged that they be invited to the right parties, the important gallery and museum openings, and made sure the writers and critics of that day knew of Jackson Pollock.

Although it was a world much smaller, easier to manipulate than today, it was hard work. But as a trained painter herself, she knew she had the genuine article - a real artist obsessed by the need to make art. The material gain-and-fame side of it was Lee's forte and she was both brilliant at it and ruthless in its pursuit.

Above all, she loved doing it.

"Little Image"

Had Lee been content for her and Jackson to live simply as two artists painting, that would have been fine with Jackson. He encouraged her, had great admiration for what she did and for her intelligence. The fact that she was a creature of strategy and tactics was not one he necessarily understood.

Even had Jackson not died when he did, there is no doubt that Lee was getting ready to start her own career as a painter. It would have been more difficult and awkward, but, being Lee, she would have found the ways. It was time. She was 48 years of age when he died.

Her 1946-1949 series of "Little Image" all-over paintings, of which "Shattered Color" is included in this exhibit, is, in this reviewer's opinion, among her most original early works, in which she was closest to Jackson in his unending calligraphic trail and buildup.

Who influenced whom barely matters. What is significant is the mutuality of their devotion to the adventure of creating their lives through painting.

Joan Mitchell

Certainly, Joan Mitchell took Abstract Expressionism to a new high. A five-foot oil on canvas in this show, an untitled painting from 1952, is a joy to see, its swift improvisatory lines daubed in punctuations of color and scrubbed in layering.

She was the most independent of the women, having gone to France after years in New York as part of the Abstract Expressionist group that gathered around de Kooning, Pollock, and Kline. Always her own woman, she lived outside of Paris in the house and gardens previously inhabited by Claude Monet.

She certainly achieved recognition both in her lifetime and posthumously, with regular exhibits at the Robert Miller Gallery and now with a recently published book on her life and work marvelously written and compiled by Klaus Kertess (Abrams 1997).

Elaine de Kooning

Elaine de Kooning is represented in this show with seven canvases of varying scope, from the biomorphic compositions of 1948 to 1956's hard-driving brushstroke of major scale, power, speed, seen in the daring and vividly colorful "California."

There is an extraordinary portrait of her husband, seated, simultaneously painted and drawn in the AbEx style she continued to develop over the years.

As the wife of the greatest living artist of our time, she surely had special problems in maintaining her own persona. However, when asked "How can you work in his shadow?" she replied, "I don't work in his shadow, I work in his light."

Never competitive, she was genuine in recognition of his greatness. She was herself a great enough artist to be selfless in the interests of art itself. On the other hand, she never really behaved as a wife. Her husband once turned to her and said, "We live like a couple of bachelors. What we need is a wife."

Dorothy Dehner

When we come to Dorothy Dehner, this reviewer is hard put to place her within the Abstract Expressionist framework. She did produce the drawings, prints, and cast-bronze sculpture shown in the exhibit during the right timeline.

She was divorced from the great sculptor David Smith (who considered himself an Abstract Expressionist both in his sculptures and in the paintings he loved doing), and Dr. Marter may assume that some of his art rubbed off on her.

Certainly her work has always been interesting. In this case, however, the curator may well be suspected of favoring the wives of famous men or getting two for the price of one.

Perle Fine

On the other hand, she makes up for it with the inclusion of the incomparable Perle Fine, who spent years studying with Hans Hoffman and truly was ignored in her own lifetime.

That fact did not deter her from her devotion to her art, aided and abetted by a husband who took pleasure in encouraging and financially supporting her.

Her abstractions and collages of the '50s were certainly outstanding within the mode, although ultimately she turned toward geometric abstractions and a stylistic austerity reminiscent of Agnes Martin.

Schwabacher And Parsons

Ethel Schwabacher, working under Arshile Gorky, about whom she wrote a book, used the canvas as an arena of personal struggle, in pigment of translucent radiance.

Her work, both the figure and abstract forms, is fresh, hovering between Abstract Expressionism and Surrealism.

Betty Parsons, the dealer turned artist, trusted her drive toward surrealism and automatism to propel her into the artistic psyche she eagerly sought.

It is in the small Spiga Gallery that some real surprises await. In addition to two works by Buffie Johnson (the only living artist in the show), there is a rich trove of work by painters who appear to have been neglected before Ms. Stein looked to see what was on hand.

Spiga Gallery

It includes Gertrude Greene, married to the painter Balcomb Greene, and Linda Lindeberg, the wife of the painter Georgio Cavallon. Both marriages are known to have respected each partner's individual rights as artist. In no case was the woman subject to the career needs of her husband. In both cases, they both came first.

Linda Lindeberg, so neglected and forgotten, was outstanding for her lyrical abstract stroke as well as her fine figurative works, no less Abstract Expressionist for their recognizable elements. The figure appeared repeatedly in Bill de Kooning's paintings, too.

Gertrude Greene, a bold, expansive presence, was one of the early structural abstractionists as well as an AbEx enthusiast. There is in her work a material energy that was natural and necessary to her temperament as an original thinker. A member with her husband of the abstract artists group as early as 1936, she is remembered as being impassioned and outrageous.

Ilse Getz

Last but certainly not least is Ilse Getz, whose 1959 oil "The Persian Note," with its rich collaged elements and impasto, imparts the joy and energy of gesture and the sheer gusto of physically wielding the brush and palette knife in an expansive space.

It shows as well the influence of Hans Hoffman in its tangles, splatters, and bristle. But, as far as I am concerned, the more Hoffman the better.

Still, it's Ilse Getz all the way and it's great to see her.

But where is the Abstract Expressionist Alice Baber, whose struggle - as it was everyone's, including the innovators themselves - was to make her own mark, her distinct and recognizable touch. She transformed the stroke to a layering of transparent, balloon-like shapes which she floated through the canvas in the same restless, probing spirit as the other AbExers.

Market-Driven

As this Guild Hall show demonstrates, the women artists of the '50s were as strong, individual, and diverse in their gesturalism as the men, a fact that male artists of the time recognized and respected.

The discriminatory tactics which kept the women at a disadvantage in the marketplace did not come out of the male-driven art world but out of an institutionalized art world driven by the marketplace. It is a marketplace that discriminates against the men as well.

These were not submissive, victimized women. These were tough, self-insistent, brilliantly gifted, and utterly impassioned painters. They persisted against odds at a time that was both inspired and dominated by the emblazoned gifts of giants, who eclipsed everyone around them, both the women and the men.

Altogether, this show challenges a period that was the most complicated in recent American art history. And the show is only the first step. There is more to come.

The current exhibit remains on view through June 15.

The experience of visiting a new house in Springs by Barnes Coy and Associates Architects is like taking a vacation to an imaginary kingdom. The road leading to it winds through the wooded hills near Springs to the old Bell Estate, where it climbs and then dips, ending like the final flourish of a roller coaster.

And there before you are the craggy stone ramparts and soaring heights of a 21st-century castle. A cautious glance about discerns two choices - walk down the rest of the driveway to the subterranean level or go straight ahead across the footbridge that links the parking court to the front door.

Sunken Pool

This bridge, foreshortened in photographs, is actually quite long, allowing time to peruse the view. To the left is an open meadow bordered by trees, to the right the continuation of the surrounding hill, wooded and protecting.

Below is the biggest surprise of all, a swimming pool, sunk within the thick stone walls that form the base of the house. In a second or two you have safely crossed the moat and are greeted by the front door.

A turn to the right and up two steps to the left and the fortress dissolves into a vast view of Gardiner's Bay. It is breathtaking because it is so unexpected.

Chris Coy and Robert Barnes readily confess to working out the turn at the entrance on purpose, almost taking advantage of the giddiness of height. They also explained the problems of designing the house to span the hilly site while staying within the restrictions of waterfront property and building codes.

Engineering Tour De Force

But being there you realize that the result transcends the nuts and bolts of setbacks, engineering, and the practical planning of 4,000 square feet of living space. Moving through all the spaces, from the vast open living room at the top to the master bedroom suite one level down and then down transparent glass-backed stairs to the lower level, is really exhilarating.

There is also no denying that this is an engineering tour de force. The stone ramparts and walls are the footings for the intricate and almost delicate network of steel that frames the house and roof. The rest is glass, a curtain wall of glass facing the water, and smaller triangles of glass in the roof where skylights are really continuations of the windows.

Inside, floors of marble and bluestone stretch toward the glass but appear to hang suspended, with the glass running a foot or so below the floor level. In the living room a horizontal rail of steel finished in soft gray offers security to the fainthearted and a seat to those brave enough to turn their backs on the view.

Luxurious Woodwork

To offset the rough texture of the limestone walls and the cool expanses of window, the interior finishes are mostly wood: teak, cherry, maple, and, in the kitchen, exotic bubinga.

The detailing of the woodworking, inset splines of contrasting maple, unusual shapes, and satiny smooth finishes invite closer scrutiny and draw attention inward from the wider view. Although the rough limestone walls are intended to have the unfinished, rugged effect of ancient ruins, the refined woodwork is truly luxurious.

All of this was accomplished over 18 months with intense supervision on site and in the selection of materials. The limestone required trips to Pennsylvania and the marble two journeys to Georgia.

Signature Door

Robert Kessler, a mason, built all the stone portions, including the 11-foot-long solid slab that serves as the fireplace mantel. Visits were also made to Woodstock, N.Y., to consult with the cabinetmaker, Stephen Robin.

Ken Davis, a Barnes Coy associate, functioned as construction manager. Case Brothers of Hampton Bays did the woodwork and Grains of Wood, an East Hampton firm, made the mahogany doors that have become Barnes Coy's signature. These doors have a partitioned center panel that can be fitted with clear or sandblasted glass or with wood, depending on the privacy and light requirements.

In the master bedrooms one of these doors glides easily into a pocket in the wall. When closed and latched the door drops down and is locked in position, preventing drafts and leaks around all its edges.

Nature All Around

Another interesting and practical device is their trademarked bathroom mirror, with sandblasted edges that cover the lighting in one clean sweep, eliminating the question of sconces and adequate light.

The owners of this house, a couple with children, have used the house on weekends since last summer. However, they are taking the time to refine their decisions on the interior furnishings and are working with the architects to find just the right pieces -a continuation of the creative and collaborative process. They will make their selections as they experience the house through the seasons.

In this house nature is not an element to be taken lightly. It is above, beneath, and all around you and is constantly changing. And it is nature that makes this house seem even more out of this world.

A Montauk broker who has sold real estate there for 25 years sees nothing but smooth sailing on the horizon.

Recent sales activity in the hamlet has been concentrated on the high-end market, said Ray Hegner, who thinks the trend will continue.

"I'm waiting for all this money from the current stock market to reach Montauk," he said.

Mr. Hegner said his firm sold two million-dollar houses in Montauk during the past six months.

Death In March

Brokers say summer rentals, from Memorial Day to Labor Day, were "very, very good" earlier this year, and commanded high prices. Rental activity began in January and continued into February, but died in March. Brokers blame the rainy, cold weather for its death.

Houses with views were rented in the $40,000 range; houses with pools, $30,000, and oceanfront homes got up to $43,000. Families have been the most frequent renters, according to Mr. Hegner.

Frank Tuma of the Tuma Agency said he still has a few rentals available. And a lot of land deals. Mr. Tuma's agency handles the Culloden Shores property, among others.

Culloden Shores

Culloden Shores, which consists of 54 lots, is being sold in sections. There are 15 lots in the first section, seven of them classified as waterfront and eight as water views. Sales began at the end of last summer and four have sold to date.

The prices range from $155,000 for a one-acre water view lot to $450,000 for a three-acre lot on the water.

Montauk's house inventory has diminished in recent months. According to the brokers at Sea and Sun and the Tuma Agency, a tremendous amount of sales in the past two years has limited the market.

Brokers agreed land sales are the next trend to watch.

"Because houses were the biggest sellers during the last two years, motivated landowners are now willing to negotiate," Joan Gallop, Mr. Hegner's associate, said. Mr. Hegner added, "We have lots available in every area and on every body of water in Montauk."

Six Vacant Acres

The lowest-priced listing for a piece of vacant land at Sea and Sun Realty is a one-third-acre parcel selling for $75,000.

On the high end of the spectrum is a six-acre, oceanfront, two-parcel lot. The owner will not subdivide. The house is located high on the Montauk bluffs right next door to celebrity neighbors. The selling price? A mere $1.75 million.

Mr. Hegner would not say who the neighbors were, but he did hint that it might be helpful if the buyer liked music. Does anyone hear the sounds of silence in the surf?

This is the fourth article in a series examining various aspects of real estate on the South Fork.

Whether you're talking about residential or commercial real estate, a limited supply and a demand for prime location are making East Hampton Village properties, well, in demand.

The dearth of undeveloped residential land puts a premium on the few vacant lots that do exist and creates a burgeoning market for potential "teardown" properties. As for commercial activity, the desire to have a presence in the small but ever more glitzy business district along Main Street and Newtown Lane continues to bring in high-visibility tenants and even higher rents.

What's that popular saying in the real estate industry? Location, location, location . . .

Stores All Taken

"The village is one of the hottest areas in the Hamptons," Kim Hovey, the owner of the Mrs. Condie Lamb Agency in East Hampton, said this week. "People are willing to pay top dollar for it." That goes for both residential and commercial properties.

"Everything's supply and demand," said Judi Desiderio, the managing partner of Cook Pony Farm, which has several offices on the East End.

Virtually all commercial space in the village is rented for the fast-approaching summer season except for the small shops in the former Veterans of Foreign Wars building, which now houses the eye-catching London Jewelers. Earlier this spring, however, there were at least four vacant stores available, which, brokers said, may have kept rents from soaring over the moon.

What Determines Price

The number of vacancies is just one of several factors affecting prices. Among others: the size of the space (under 1,000 square feet costs proportionately more than larger space); proximity to the Main Street-Newtown Lane intersection (rent increases the closer you get; Dr. Alan York's building at No. 1 Main, right on the corner, is said to bring the highest rent in the village), conditions imposed in the lease, and the actual physical condition of the space.

Stores that were leased to new tenants this spring, said Ms. Desiderio, did not rent for as much as the landlords had expected. That's not to say they got less than in the past, but simply that tenants were not willing to pay as much as the owners had thought they would.

Rents can only go up so much, Ms. Desiderio suggested.

Per Square Foot

An optimistic David Fink, the owner of three Main Street commercial properties and a real estate attorney in Manhattan who also lives in Wainscott, said his rentals were what he thought they would be.

However, Ben Krupinski, who owns the former Brooks building on Pantigo Road, told The Star he had rented that retail space (to Plaza Sports) for less than market value. The building is just past the main shopping area.

Rents in the business district range from about $45 a square foot to $70 per square foot. Few disagree that these prices have made it virtually impossible for individually owned and operated stores to do business in East Hampton Village.

Metamorphosis

Except for a few old standbys like White's, Dreesen's, Mark Fore and Strike, and the two hardware stores, the metamorphosis of Main Street and Newtown Lane in the past two decades is almost complete.

Gone are the locally owned shops. In their place have come high-end stores often associated with metropolitan or national chains.

In East Hampton Village, buyers are buying for the land, not for the buildings on it.

Marley's is gone, along with the News Company, the Whitman Gallery, even the East Hampton Shoe Store (now on Park Place), to be replaced by Kenar, Ralph Lauren Polo, McCarver and Moser, and the soon-to-open Cynthia Rowley.

Residential Property

As for East Hampton houses and residential properties, they are in demand not just because of the popularity of the Hamptons but because of their proximity to village attractions - tony shops, the movie theater, the beach, a train station, and the Hampton Jitney stop.

"The village . . . is a location," said Dick Baker, the office manager of Amaden-Gay Realty in East Hampton. Clients tell him, "I want to walk to get the paper, I want to walk to the movies. . . . "

In residential real estate, little empty land on which to build means people are either renovating and adding onto what they buy or simply tearing down the old to build anew.

The village offers "vastly different" properties, said Mr. Baker, ranging from small lots and houses on side streets for about $200,000 to large estate-section abodes south of the highway going for as much as $10 million.

North Of Highway

Even properties north of the highway "are very much in demand," said Mr. Baker, noting that houses in the village make great investments for people who'd like to rent for a month or a season and live here themselves the rest of the time.

On the lower end, Mr. Baker recently sold a house on Maidstone Avenue for $250,000. The buyer is putting another $175,000 into renovations and additions, said the real estate broker.

In other words, if you can't find the house you want, or even an affordable vacant parcel to build on, you work with what's available.

"There is precious little" vacant land left in the village, said Mr. Baker. In East Hampton, the estate section is considered relatively small compared to Southampton or Bridgehampton.

People are buying developed estate section lots and either doing major renovations or, in some cases, tearing down existing houses and starting from scratch.

The bottom line: Buyers are buying for the land, not for the buildings on it.

Ms. Hovey cited a Cottage Avenue house bought not long ago for $1.6 million. Four or five months later, without a single alteration, it was sold for $2.1 million. The newest owners, she said, didn't buy because it was their dream house, but because of the location.

Christie Estate

Vacant parcels off Montauk Highway in the village, between Georgica and Jericho Roads, are being sold by John Shanholt, an East Hampton broker. According to recorded deeds, they are selling at under $200,000, relatively low prices, probably because of their proximity to the noisy highway.

Ms. Hovey's real estate company, itself located in a village office, has the exclusive on lots in the former Christie estate, a 10-lot subdivision between David's and Pondview Lanes that contains some of the village's last vacant land.

The lots range from 1.4 to 2.5 acres, with asking prices from $950,000 to $1.4 million. One has been sold and another is in contract, Ms. Hovey said.

The broker said the subdivision's ideal location (it is within walking distance of the Maidstone Club, she noted) made those prices realistic, and the development's preserved hedgerow and easements made it that much more desirable.